Happy Early Birthdays to whazzmaster’s own bellygirl. How old are you, old lady? Gettin up there near your husband, I suppose. And you’llc elebrate the special day how? Tequila in TJ? Fish Tacos at South Beach? Is Parker gonna lick cake off your face? Let us know how the day goes; if it was a weekend I’d just fly down and party with you. Que sera, I’ll have to imagine the fun times you’ll have. Don’t let wwhazz give you any guff, he should have to do shots and dance cuz it’s your b-day.
Happy Birthday, Bellygirl!
Sunday, June 18th, 2006
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I’m playing the Aussie and baking a cake. I’ll let you know how it goes.
It’s angel food from a mix. 72 left in the Aussie.
The cake is out of the pan. Now I must figure out a way to frost it and store it.
In the Aussie I went all in with AKs on a 2JK flop. Got called by 22 and JJ. Don’t worry: I runner, runner flushed them.
Cake is frosted. 17 of 33 in the Aussie.
The cake is in the fridge. 18 of 24 in the Aussie.
Clean up done.
14 of 21.
I ate too much frosting.
12 of 18 at the break.
17th for 0$. Ug… AA all in preflop to K6s. Flop gave me a SET and him a flush draw. Blah, blah, blah. Sick. Two off the money.
I can’t even see what play the dude was making on me. I’m in 6th with 8K he has 18K. The blinds are 200-400. I pop it 1600 from early position. He is on my left and he raises 2K more. I push and he calls. I need the skeezer hear to confirm, but I’m pretty sure dude was fucking around and got lucky. Who knows. A little internet research tells me the dude is a pro and plays all the big on-line tournaments. maybe a 50$ is treated like I treat a 5$. Who knows? Sucks though.
I wish the Skeezer was HERE ya hear?
I am the greatest broke poker player IN THE WORLD
At least my wife is finally legal and Tom Goes to the Mayor was incredible x 100. Good night.
happy birthday bellygirl!!!!!!!!!!
Coming soon: my views on the type of human that would register taintpuncher.com as a college humor clone. Preview: sub.
anyone out there? Old Man? timmah?
We just woke up and now it’s off to the beach bars. Rock out! After that I think she wants to drink High Life and watch Raw, but I’m not 100% sure about that.
Also, more thoughts on last nights heartbreaker: I guess dude figured he had two options: 1. blow me off the pot and scoop the blinds (they were 300-600 not 200-400) plus my 1600 raise without a fight as most everyone was bunkered down not wanting to blow out on the bubble. 2. Out play me on the flop which was not out of the question as he was outplaying a lot of players on the flop.
Both of these were resonable plays unless I had AA or KK, but after I reraised he was not going to leave a 8K pot for only 5K more.
This was a bad beat but dude was not a dipshit.
happy birthday jessi! hope that frosted angel food cake is all the dessert you could dream of.
holy hell i’m back. and more married than ever.
i just sort of skimmed the comments, but i think i got the jist… happy first bath bellgirl, and rumsey congratulations on concurring africa. as for poker… if i’m that dude with K6s with a stack that could lose to you heads up and still have more than you started the hand with, and is likely going to be only a slight dog most of the time and has fold equity to up my stack 10%, i’m probably raising and gambling there too… could i find a better spot? yeah. so why not wait for it? it’s S00000000000000ted!#@
so far, my night is looking awesome: $20 NLHE in 6 minutes. great getting back on the horse tourney. right after, $2 turbo rebuy… my mouth she be a waterin. then the long kiss… lets kick ass, take names, sign them up for credit cards and get free brewers hats and tshirts. and what be this?!?! $100 freeroll in PLO8?!?! I’M IN! 2000 people and i guarantee i win the bitch. HOLLLARIT.
i have already busted out of the $20 and the omaha freeroll. as needed. now i will win the kiss and the 2tr (my own term) ($2 turbo rebuy if you’re nasty).
down to 70 in the kiss. why do i play this game again?
2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR! 2TR!
70 chips, not 70 people. i saw bellgirls chips too.
and all you unmarried guys, wow… sex is awesome. you should really hurry up and get hitched. it’s totally worth it.
up to 2740 in the 2tr. the cake is in the oven.
the cake is gone. all of it.
We are back from the beach. Driving is no longer an option so we are switching to the twolly. It’s pretty much sex drugs and rock and roll for the rest of the night. No gambling or wrasslin. HOLLAIRT QUINCE!!!!!!!!!
last tourney of the night still going: $30 144 man. 144 is a perfect square. it is also a fibonacci number. which means it is directly related to the golden ratio. how can i lose? anyways i’m $150 deep in tourney fees and this is my last bullet. i’m 10th of 24. the cake was lovingly prepared and is moments away from being ready to be taken out of the oven. hopefully i’ll be frosting this bitch in no time. HOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLARIT. (*#@&%(#*&%FEEL the STYLE!
20th. bye.
tom goes to the mayor was very good, even mrsssssssssss enjoyed it. i’m pretty sure she even sympathized with tom a little. oh tom. you try so hard but ultimately it might just be posible that you make things worse. but tom, what if you don’t try? who will?
maybe that fucker Kid HenDONK*** that knocked you out of the tourney?
perhaps, tom. perhaps.
screech drives too fast
you shouldn’t swear tom
fuck all that shit. 1st was like 2k. 2k homie. fuck all that shit.
here is a great tom goes to the mayor episode. adult swim, if you find this, take it. just make sure the poker pro’s name is “whazzmaster”. so a poker pro comes into town and shows the mayor how “profitable” poker is and if his citizens were REQUIRED to play poker, that would be a huge boost to the local economy. the mayor gets the wheels in motion to make it a law that at the end of every month, the entire city has to play a poker tournament for all their money. “whazzmaster” of course is a poker whizz and cleans the town out, well, he would if it weren’t for tom…. OR WOULD HE?! also, one of the characters must be called “the don” and wear a bennigans hat. that shit is funny right thurr.
back from th4 giants game/winters
good to see scientist back on the HORSE, even if he did lose the tourney. how was the snorkelin, dude? did you use the thing i got you underwater? how much booze did you rack up on the ol’ tab? i miss you.
just had a thousand hour convo with the birthday lass, she is doing well. i told her to make wwhazz take a shot and make him dance. then i told her a secret. if she tells, i get to taint punch her.
maddddd, i went on tilt in 3-6 the other night: not good. basically my post hand was AKs, cappy cappy pre flop with 4 in, cap flop of 38K, 3 bet turn Q, call 1 bet river 9. He has KQ. TILLLLLLTTTTTED, so i cap the next hand preflop with 67o, flop gives me an inside str8 draw so’s i cap it, then fold to a bet on the turn, the i ghost.ghost.ghost.ghost it. i’m dumb, that’s why i don’t play poker for a living.
have a good evening folksies
by the way, i showed GMC 28 Day Slater tonight. he is a Fan.
thanks for all the birthday wishes, it is now officially over for another year, which is quite sad cause i really love birthdays. madd glad to have you back how was the honeymoon over miami?? B-day was good, i couldn’t get wwhazz to do a shot and dance though, but the funny thing is i didn’t really feel like it myself, maybe i’m growing up into my 25 year old self. wwhazz did a good job on the birthday, a new CD, godiva chocolates, a day at the beach and sushi at night. NOt bad at all. Yes I did get a secret told to me but I PROMISE it won’t be revealed.
ok got to go i’m being molested, time for some more birthday presents…..hehehe…
Geez where is every today, did I scare them away with the visual images of my husband and I doing grown up married activities, if I did I apologize.
Parker and I had two pieces of birthday cake today for breakfst, it was mmmmmmmmmm good, I think that is what I might have for lunch too.
Rumsey what color are your bridesmaid dressed, purple?? lavendar??? I’m going to look for a new dress cause all I have is black and i don’t think that is appropriate for a summer wedding on the beach but I don’t want to match the wedding party. Oh and Mike received a suit in the mail from his dad for the wedding, we’ll have him try it on and send a photo and you can approve or disaaprove it. Just let us know. Maybe we should post it on whazzmaster for all to see, wouldn’t that be cute.
Yo whazzmaster,
Did you know that Candice Michelle is from Milwaukee?
Wow. More fun. Did you know that Solomon Hutcherson (that huge black dude with a big gap in his front teeth from the Ultimate Fighter 3) is from Ray town? You guys know that dude?
Screech has bigger problems than speeding tickets:
http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=435980
You’ve been too busy child rearin’. The speeding ticket story was already the cherry on top of the house story.
dammit
Oh yeah, how’s the child-rearin’ going? Are you guys coming to The O’Rumsey Affaire?
BELLY–good guess on the purple dresses, you’d think so since i am obsessed with purple but i actually decided to shake it up and do something different so the ladies will be in burnt orange. exact hue according to watters & watters: spice. you would look beautiful in any dress, black brown or rainbow colored, but if you would like to know the spex there you have them. aaron’s in charge of the suits. a little preview for you–the wwhazz tie will also be spice. my (excuse me, our) wedding has turned into a circus, everyone. what i thought would be a cake, a dress, and a few speeches takes up about 6 hours of my life every day. it better be worth it!
and yes, hadley will make her debut at the o’rumsey affaire. according to our RSVP list she’s abstaining from dinner though. walleye isn’t up her alley.
i’ll take hadley’s walleye
Shit. I wanted it.
Hadley will also be holding off on dinner at the pre-wedding extravaganza. Also, spice seems like a very complimentary color to purple.
Child rearing is going well. We have the ol’ one month Dr. appt. today and I can’t wait to find out how much she weighs. Feel free to start making bets. She started at 6#5.7oz.
I’m so excited for the Lawman/Rumsey wedding!!! I was looking at the calendar and it is coming up soon!!!
wwhazz: too slow, bitch! i’m quick with the snappin-up of infants’ seafood
scientist was back for a minute and then left again. fake scientist?
rumsey- thanks for the info, i had a feeling it really wasn’t purple so i’m glad i asked. spice, that sounds beatiful in july. and about the planning, i realize it gets frustrating and time consuming, but i promise it will be worth it. and be careful it goes soooooooo fast when you finally get to that last week. sometimes i wish we could do it again, not the planning but the big day, but thankfully we have a professioinally made dvd that i play often to relive it that way. and i am tickled that hadley is coming i can’t wait to see her!!!!!! i’m guessing she weighs 7#14oz.
9 pounds 3 oz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
K-car got her eating brats already?
i had to go back to ray town to get the dog, so i’ve spent the last 2 days driving intermixed with a few hours with arlo out drinking…. you know that bar across from the kewpee? pub on wisconsin? it used to be this tiny yokel place… now they bought up the adjoining office suites and splashed a few layers of rayray class on the joint and now they are pulling in younger crowds and having DJs….. if my uncle set up a hamburger stand outside he would make $1000 a night cash. also, that solomon dude did look very familiar, at the time i just figured it was because he had a gap and i thought i was looking in the mirror or something. guess how much a pint of whiskey sour costs in racine at the pub on wisconsin? $1. jesus christ this city is going to drink itself stupid. driving through uptown to the Q, pretty much everyone on streets looks like they stepped straight out of a nellyville music video…. whites/blacks/latinos…. it isn’t a race thing… it’s a raytown thing… and it’s going to culminate in the great gang war of 2012. place bets now. i got my money on whatever squad a-money sides up with. the don can’t lose.
I wish it were true, but I’m pretty sure the Don can’t win.
THE DON CAN NOT LOSE.
no one drives over 70 on the freeway anymore… it’s really weird. like traffic analysis is one of my passions, and my stereo still doesn’t work since the wedding shaming, so i was all over this shit. so WHY? is ALWAYS the question, and IT DEPENDS is ALWAYS the answer, so lets just jump right ahead to step 3 and lay out some po-see-blays… (instant whazzmaster classic?)
1. “by publicly breaking the law for my own personal gain, am i a terrorist?” rating: i will say that FOR CERTAIN the public “war on terror” has contributed a mesurable amount to this decline, but given this widespread change i can only assume this is a small ingredient in a pretty complex goo-lash with at least 18 types of goo, and lash from every continent save antartica. so 2. “i have a reason to not want to deal with the cops”…. well, there have always been cops and cars as far as i know, so if this is a contributing reason it must relate to current societal change. what is changing? technology and the distribution of information. how would that relate to police? instant access to all warrants around the world as well as all criminal activity anywhere ever. 20 years ago if you robbed a liquor store, got pinned locally but never got caught and moved to a different state under and assumed name i bet you could get pulled over a good 20 times before i’d even worry about them catching up with your priors 4000 miles away… so pretty much i feel there is a “warrant bubble” slowing some petty criminals down just so they don’t have to deal with their priors that might be compounding expontential penalties implying this will only get worse. much worse. ok, maybe.
3. “i’m just driving slow because i just keep up with traffic and try not to be a dick or unsafe, and everyone else is going slow” this definately contributes, and given that we already have 2 things that might contribute to this, you can at least double their effectiveness as we add more just because of this side effect.
and 4. “i ALWAYS drove the speed limit… i hate you fucking fair weather do-gooders saying i changed with you all!!! I WAS ALWAYS A GOOD DRIVER YOU ASSHOLES! I DESERVE THE CREDIT” almost guaranteed that guy exists out there… maybe now he’ll start driving fast and start the circle of life over again?! oh man, times are a changing. also, like seriously… the streets of raytown are ALIVE. i’m talking groups of 3-5 kids EVERYWHERE. driving through uptown saw like 200 kids at least… and every single person had a shirt that went below their knees on. what will this do to the clothing market? as they get older will they just wear the same shit, because it will still fit them way to fucking big, but it won’t be AS fucking big….. will they still want it bigger? if so, the clothing market is going to boom because they’ll be selling 100% more fabric even if item sales stay flat. but, if the street scenesters grow found of their durable large clothing, they could wear it a lifetime without replacing it…. sadly this would suggest the clothing market buried itself. hubris the catalyst… as it all too often is. man i gotta get that stereo fixed.
and through it all, at 1pm on a weekday, the kewpee was exceptionally clean… fight club economics. great time to be in the church business.
also, i spent a lot of time thinking about a hypothetical i posed to myself…… most people today are not happy with american politics… if you live here you don’t really like it, and if you don’t live here you really don’t really like it. so republicans are in charge, and people are sort of sick of the whole republican/democrat thing, and throughout history there were MANY MANY other parties, so there must be a way to force this change. so my theory: all democrats bow out of the elections in 2008. just take a season off…. a sabat-o-cal if you will… if you were right, and the republicans are to blame, the people will know… and the following elections, you step in, and everyone votes for you, and maybe you have a little competition from the fledgling green party or libertairians or communists or whatever, but you are the DEMOCRATS! i mean, come on… you can’t beat the lib-o-crazians without the repo boys on your backs? come on dawg… you got this. so the obvious rebut to this is what makes it interesting. “look, society was sort of in trouble, and we knew it was in trouble and we were all working really really hard to fix it. the democrats knew it would be a rough 10 years and weren’t willing to help. look, it’s getting bad, but we’re almost through it and we already know how to make it better… just trust us, we’ve always been there for you. we won’t quit. the democrats did.” damn, that is powerfully obvious. any thoughts? i just bombed out of the $10 rebuy in 24th. chip leader pot, pair and gutshot and flush draw. ends up he has overpair kings….. i miss…. i miss…. i lose. fucking democrats.
america… i say we do this. 1. get vince mcmahon. 2. tell him america would like an “I QUIT” match between the republicans and democrats. 3. allow him and his staff full control over all details and procedures leading up to and during execution of this match.
i’d pay to see that
don’t worry….. it will broadcast free of charged over the newly formed comcast-deneutralized-informatioNet. the informatioNet is totally cooler than the internet you lame-o’s. also, ITS FREE!!! YAH PUSH ONLY EFFECTIVE COMPUTING! YAH!
why let some faceless international hodge-podge decide where to direct requests to yahoo.com when the informatioNet could arbitrarily send such requests to the comcast sweatshirt shop? i mean, it really it a no brainer. GO INFORMATIONET! hmmm….. i wonder if they will sell the sweatshirts in raytown “supah-large” or SL. will they also offer sweatshirts in SSL? will they have a funny pun on the front about socket layers and how they are kept secure by means of protocol? bah.
oil, ye be me only remainin’ hope.
midnight oil that is. texas tea. black gold.
i think cal should take a sabat-o-cal with a new friend named sabat that he should meet on the internet. that would be awesome. 1 year together. cal and sabat on their combined sabat-o-cal. o’rumsey will film. i will executive produce e-commuting from barbados. i will be in a bar in barbados, so don’t let that mix you up in your addressing of my personal mail. 2 bar’s. annunciate.
good to have you back, sir. i missed you. stacy arrives a la manana (you’ll have to imaginarily insert the squiggly over the n) and i have a weekend of nothing planned, or as bellygirl would call it: the anti-vacation. she would be horrified, but i say “let the weekend take us where the weekend wills”. maybe it will be to a filipino arcade in oakland where i have to dance dance revolution to save stacy from a gang of thugs. perhaps it will be to a 27 hole disc course in santa cruz where we discover buried treasure. or perhaps, just perhaps, we’ll hunt the elusive Cal in the City of San Francisco, and just before i spring the trap i’ll whisper, “hey cal, o’neil sends his regards.” who knows.
actually, i’d prefer it if stacy utters the action hero one-liner to cal. voice: slightly husky, dripping with contempt.
my official mailing address:
madddddddddddddddddd
bar in barbados
barbados
Good reading! Anyone up yet? Are the little babies up? Cal?
I’m calling ewaz right now
No answer
Im still up SNGing my balls off.
good morning
Right now hadder is faking me out. She’ll let you a really loud cry and i’ll run into her room and there she is sleeping like… a baby. Then I go back to bed, start to fall asleep, and then she yells again. Rinse and repeat. I have now come up with the tactic of heating up a bottle which should guarantee that she will sleep some more. We’ll see.
You still around here??
what is the live bookmark on mozilla?
Yeah… gimme a call.
Madd, the turbos start again at 5:00am cali time. I’m in!
Nice call…
Do any of you know what the 1st cartoon is after Adult Swim ends at 5:30? T-Force staring Mr. T.
MR. T
Still kickin 3 sngs
Back to even on the week… deep in a 5$ turbo
Bedtime after this puppy
Made the shit money… bedtime.
I’m back up
rock and bowl
damn, i just posted because i didn’t want to do the math to figure out what “whazzmaster” time it was here…. time to break pokerroom off. 2 days and about $275 in tourney fees with NO cashes. wow.
up until 7am. nice. that is 1 hour after the bitches leave the livingroom after getting it on.
if the democrats bowed out, and the republicans tanked the job of policy making as expected, and even if that did lead to the eventual election of nearly 0 republicans a near 100% control of both houses for the democrats… those first few years in office, do you really think they could do any better? if not, then their course of action that got them the power would also kill them just as it had killed their enemies. i think the only reason they haven’t done it yet is because they aren’t at all confident in their own ability to make policy. pussy ass democrats. what fucking pussies.
4th of 51 from 105 in the 20. the cake is in the pan.
i’m pre-heating.
congrats on gaining sooo much weight hadley, i guess i forgot my obstetrics and peds information already. i talked to the happy pair in mountain view and all seems well, wish i could be there.
Last night was maddness. I tanked out of the Oil 3 out of the money (AKs vs 1010 for a big ole pot) and then played a 10sng and was out in 3 hands with KK to AJ UN-soooted. This left me with 2.75 in my account which I took to a .25-.50 limit table and ran up to 12 bucks which I then invested in 5sngs and 5turbo multis until I had it up to 100 bucks. Then I watched the end of Mr. T (it’s like Scooby Doo excpet the gang is Mr. T and a bunch of gymnists and this little cracker who dresses and acts like Mr. T) and went the fuck to sleep. Pretty dumb as I had to be at work today at 2:00. Oh well. In the morning I work 8-3 at the hotel and then 9-2am downtown parking cars. Say-la-vee. You know I’m still playing the Oil tonight…
duh
i will play every tourney from now until the oil. even if i have 4 already going…. i am going to fucking win something tonight. 3 days in a row. no cashes. come the fuck on. and my stories today are crazy. doom switch verification level crazy, and not only that, but a frightening new look into the inner psyche’ of the doom switch and/or it’s creator. i believe it might be sentient. you know that movie where people were supposed to die on some plane crash, but didn’t, and then phil collins saw them at a show… haha, the phil collins part was a lie, but the kids that didn’t die all died anyways because fate keeps score, and much like a junior football league, a higher consciousness keeps the score from being run up. that is how the doom switch works. your method of destruction has already been chosen, now the situations are simply put in front of you until point B is finally depicted on the map in front of us as a shiny star emblazened with “YOU. ARE. HERE.”
first tourney starts. table name? Milwaukee. lets take this bitch home midwest style. YA HEARD?!
you just love me cause i got 2 d’s… judd tried to copy me… i seen him before he did so… his name was ju though… just the j and the u.
jesus christ, will someone just give me a plaque already for genius of the universe?
my ethnocentric hate beat poems deserve credit!!! I AM GOING TO SPEED ON THE FREEWAY NOW!
zach’s rebut: “2, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9….” genius. pure genius.
He’s here.
Who?
The whazz-man.
is this timmah?. 1. chunky dark haired white male… yes. 2. hung over and eating mexican food… yes. 3. puking on himself and not caring… yes… and the clincher, 4. driving a VW. i saw we have a 88% chance of a positive timmah sighting.
“submitted by ben”, i think his brother was named ben. also “driving from UC davis”… uh… right in the bay area…. i’m upping this to a 94% intel rating. timmah sighting imminent.
Does he drive a beamer?
wirkus, in an attempt to make last minute wedding cashish i moonlit at bluephies tonight and waited on you in 20 years. you look the same, but a little less hair. jessi, you turn into a not-very-friendly pregnant woman so look out! jk you don’t look like mike in 30 years’ wife at all. well, what would you rather be: not married to mike or a not-very-friendly pregnant woman?
1. Can I hear a little more about the future me?
2. We too are working our collective balls off for the wedding. Jess is doing a few registry shifts this weekend and I’m off to park cars downtown. I should see a nipple or a vagina or two. Say-la-vee.
rumsey… i have no fucking clue what you said, but i’m pretty sure it was hateful. nice!
hey w-whazz, what would you rather have, your dick blown off, or all of africa destroyed by nukes?
timmah drives a green vw passat… isn’t that a vw logo on the steering wheel? i just saw the v at the top and extrapolated the rest, so likelihood of error is believable. timmah, if you out there, is that you?! cal, if you see timmah…. ask him. then txt me his response. stay cool!
i think there is room in the hip hop community for the use of the term “extrapo-hated” to be used interchangably with any reference to “prejudice”. i’m sad to say that e40 should have been on this a WHILE ago… you slippin dawg. you slippin. and you know what, player? you know what? you CAN NOT slip. HOLLLLLLLARIT
weeb-o, you right, fo sho. i smell-t yo pink eye and straight extrapo-hated. that’s me weeb. that’s me. stay up dawg, i’ll get at you. one.
wirkus, in 20 years you wear yellow hats and too-big shorts. you don’t tip very well either, you bastard. jessi drinks lots of root beer and is impatient.
but you still get video boners!
haha, in 20 years you look like curious george, and jessi … wow, i knew there was a funny root beer pub there, but i couldn’t remember which root beer brand had a crazy lady in their commercials… so i googled after busting an alt-t in firefox and found this listing of every root beer brand ever. it is here i found out that cal has been lying to us all for years. flippers? whatever he does now? ALL LIES. cal has the money for extravagant west coast lifestyle because for all these years he has been selling his signature fountain drink “CAL FRESH ROOTBEER”. thanks for sharing the wealth cal… you dick. you greedy rootbeer tycoon.
Stacy was just harassed by a young punk living in my apartment complex. He said his name began with a “B” and ended with a “10″. “Beaten?” I hopefully asked. No, it was “Benton.” However, that kid needed to get beaten.
hey benton! fuck you benton.
sorry benton, i over-reacted.
Holy shit. This is what I get to watch tonight:
1. RAW en Espanol. 2. Ultimate Fighter Finale. 3. New Venture Bros. and the rest of Adult Swim.
On Monday it’s the Brewers/Cubs game and then RAW in English.
Jesus… now if there where only a way to play multi table tournaments the whole time I watch all this shit…
Man, I might like UFC as much as I like football and baseball. Cool shit. My most hated thing about sports is how it is marketed to kids. Through my work in hotels, I’ve met about 50 pro base, foot and basketballers and save a few (Michael Redd, Matt Morris, Bart Starr) they have been real fuckers. In UFC they don’t paint over this and I like that a lot. Plus, for such a brutal sport there is a hell of a lot of smarts.
Carlos Lee is going to the Yankees. I’m ok with it. It’s just how baseball is. I’d love to keep him, but we are not the type of team who buys players. We use them as long as we can and then we trade them in. If we get true value it will make us a better team. Side note: I am not doing anymore shots of tequilla for his HRs if he is traded. I will switch to Brady Clark.
well… show me a long term marketing plan for baseball that doesn’t involve kids and show me a long term marketing plan for UFC that does involve kids. guaranteed neither exists. you can’t expect baseball to live on through neccessity as you can with man on man combat…. it must have draw. it must have real action plus nostalgia to explain the pace. if you get a generation of kids marketed UFC to all their lives, well, that shit just isn’t going to work, and dana white’s audience will simply not exist anymore. instead everyone will be dead everywhere. so the comparison isn’t really fair… i say you do a tequilla shot… you know… for the kids.
I say I liked you better dead, Jeffy. If I were UFC, I’d fight 125 pounds. I’m bloated at 155 right now.
And Parker is training his empty ball sack off for his Toy Class-dog MMA match with Quincy. HOLLARIT!!!!!!!!!
And I see why the marketing has to be how it is– it makes sense, but I choose not to like it.
it is certainly more entertaining to me when marketing doesn’t make sense… but i think that is the entire point… it draws the line between entertainment and commercial… entertainment events like baseball and ufc must be both in any medium other than their home field/octogon. i’m 4th of 18 in the omaha and just started the kiss. i’ll probably do them all until the oil. must win.
my drink of opportunity tonight is jack and sprite. it smells like hotel jacuzzi. it tastes similar.
lots of MMA gyms in san diego… i’ll drop $40 for your webcast
as a large(r) man, i for one and FURIOUS that they even allow “weight classes” just so you pussy don’t have to fight the REAL DEAL up in heavyweight. it might as well be womens fighting. market that shit to the kids.
jack and sprite seems to be working. was that english?
1. I’m on the beer. Poker is off as I am the worse drunk poker player in Dago. 2. I’m just saying I’d be 125 not that I’d be good as the little timmers of the world would kill me. In HS wrestling I was pretty good (like top 11%) but I had no chance in hell against the top 10%.
And marketing… yeah. I like both sports but the bullshit of MLB and NFL NBA marketing makes me sick and the avg. culture of a UFC dude (sorry stiffly and GMX) makes me puke too. As far as Quincy/Parker 1 goes, I don’t know. Quincy is a bite first ask questions later kinda dog, but he has no experience. Parker is out at the dog parks working his way up the pecking order and he goes on much longer walks…
Maybe not top 11%… but in the “B” class of Wisconsin no matter how you break it down. Timmer was “A” class. He got a 2nd in the state as a sophmore, smoked away his junior year (but now he doesn’t touch the stuff) and lost his senior year cuz he was too brutal(DQ).
why do they even market anymore? i mean… they are out there… people know what it is, and if they don’t, they won’t, unless the marketing strategy is changed… so why even bother anymore? save the money for the event… add more explosions.
chip leader in omaha with 7 left. up to 3700 in kiss. i am a God on jacuzzi water.
chip leader with 4 left… got 4th after 2 2 out rivers in a row. that shit never stops being hilarious.
I addressed a departing GMC last night with a half-hearted “HOLLLARIT!” I think the adoption of your new word is a success when someone says it and doesn’t even get excited anymore.
just tell me when you drop down to 2 L’s… because that is when it’s over.
It will never drop down to two L’s. Wanna hear something funny about Benton? He asked where I was going and I said, “HOLLLARIT!” “hullabit?” he asked. “HOLLLARIT!” I responded. “huuvawit?” he said. “HOLLLARIT!” I said. “HUH?” he responded. Then I laughed and walked away.
fucking benton.
he’s probably the dude you are “sharing” internet with
You two should adopt Benton.
And, dude, be sure to check out the Vengence review on the wrestling blog. I have no desire to ever see it, but that review was TOP notch. Dude’s co-reviewer is a teddy bear…
Most of the things that happened (exploding penis pump ) seem made up…
what if benton is really LANDON ooooo landon you made me mad! hi whazzers!
work work work! i don’t want to work! bla!
also i am the man behind: CAL’S ROOT BEER. delicious i’ll never give up my secret recipe! never! mmmmmmmm root beer… i’d like to pour root beer on Benton (landon!). 1234123412341234
By the way I was playing poker today and I got a flip on the one-two and then I called and I had aces under fours and dude was like whaa? You said flop and I said– yes but on the RIVER? Never on the river and he was like word, that is true though. So I was like ok, let’s play oil not long kiss goodnight so we did, and I got a 12 on the blind and i folded. It was great. Then I gave birth to a hadley and decided to re-name her to Whazupnow? With the question mark and everything. Then I swam down the river to meet up with sean on the SOUTH SIDE of the americas.
3:00!
damn 3:01
love
awwwww cal. you DO pay attention.
you had me at hollarit
bored bored boring boring boring so I am SOOOOOOO annoyed that the STUPID SF GIANTS who SUCK and make you sing “god bless america” during the 7th inning stretch. not only do they do that– now they say “please rise and remove your caps!” we already did this before the game! surprised we weren’t rounded up by some usher after we stayed seated… It’s like McCarthyism And this is SAN FRANCISCO! they don’t sing that song in OAKLAND. Yay Oakland! Boo bonds stupid giants and ps your stadium is a joke. Coke bottle in the outfield coke bottle joke bottle JOKE BOTTLE! ROOT BEER JOKE BOTTLE!
wow, i thought cal loved his precious AT&T Park (aka SBC Park (aka Pac-Bell Park)). good show, mate. stacy and i would have liked to join you for a day of bases-n-balls, but alas not a ticket was to be found in the good city of san francisco. instead, we watched sea lions, took a misty trek across the Golden Gate, and rode cable cars while screaming lines from Wet Hot American Summer into the cool, pre-dusk air. then we went and had dinner with GMC and The Jacobses.
new post coming, by the way. i just needed to get that pesky girl outta my hair.
OH SNAP!
part of me wonders if the announcer said “please stay seated with your caps on” if cal and his C(al)rew…. (crew normally starts with “C”, but in this case the “C” is for “Cal” it is just a coincidence that it is also the first letter of the word it was intended to calify)…. well, if they would hop up capless and belt out god bless america. i bet they would. those fuckers.
Carew would have been a better calified version of crew. Indeed, Rod Carew was Cal’s uncle.
cal, the 7th inning god bless america is for the kids. to teach them that they can’t always wear their stinky hats, and to let them look around and see that other people like america too. now those kids are going to look over and see you and then they’ll believe what they thought all along was true: america sucks. you think these kids who hate their own country and see people like you at the game who wont even stand up for 1 stupid song JUST FOR THE KIDS…
with heads capped, we stand for no one.
dude, you totally should have tried to bone on alcatraz. off the dome i can think of 3 places, then off my tony hawk 4 dome, i can think of 8 more places, but some of them (like the bowl next to the wardens house) might not actually exist. you should take guests right from the sea lions to the stinking rose… mother fuckers would be poppin nostrils and shit. CALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
i bet you totally could have got down with the get down right behind that wicked quarter pipe on the docks.