Three days: the Perfect Amount of Time to spend in Las Vegas.
Spacebee and I have a history in Vegas; last May I met her and her friends with the sole intent to show her just how out of control I could ball. Things went pretty OK on that trip, so for her 26th birthday we hit it with the express goal of eventually quitting it.
For the first time ever, I attended a “show” in Vegas. Bellygirl and wwhazz had seen Zumanity at NY, NY so we saw that one. If you ever imagined what it would be like if a burlesque show got drunk and smashed into a fliipty-floppity-gymnastics show light pole doing 125, you need imagine no further. A highlight: a half-naked man who flew through the air on some billowy drapes at the end of the show took spacebee and I’s photograph.
A couple of notes:
- We kicked it at the Voodoo Lounge on top of the Rio. If you’re looking for an awesome view while you drink, this is the place to go. Even with the not-so-great weather (see below) it was still a fantastic time. Big ups to spacebee’s bro on the recommendation.
- The weather was not so great… while sunny, it was only getting into the high 50′s during the day. We were hoping to escape the snow to some nice days, and while 60° is better than 20° it’s not a good as 80°. We did go down to the pool on Friday, but didn’t stay long.
- We went to the Wynn on Wednesday and while it was very nice, I just couldn’t fucking afford it. Even on a Wednesday all of the table minimums were too rich for my blood. Then we went to the bar called Lure, and all seats and tables were reserved for bottle service. Bottle of Stoli? $350 Bottle of Captain Morgan’s? $450 We just couldn’t roll with that, so we took off after one drink.
- Holy shit the Bellagio sucks. We went there for just a little while on Friday night and it was packed with utter jackasses from top to bottom. The dealers were rude, and we escaped quickly. The Bellagio is over and done with. Don’t go there.
- We stayed at the MGM this trip and I ate that place alive, gambling-wise. Up $600 in craps, and around $1000 in blackjack (single deck was very good to me this week). Wynn, on the other hand, ate me alive to the tune of $500 in craps. Everywhere else was pretty much a break-even proposition.
- Old Vegas was fun as usual, we kicked it at the Golden Gate Casino and the Golden Nugget. Spacebee and I had a rollicking good time at the cheapo $1 roulette table.
- For the first time ever, instead of running the Vegas Economy solely to the benefit of restaurants and strip joints, I used my profits to actually buy stuff that I would take home with me. Spacebee and I hit the Forum shops in Caesar’s and did some shopping for purses and clothes, which was good.
- For old time’s sake we had dinner at Gallagher’s in NY, NY. Upon further reflection, it was some of the worst service I have ever encountered in a restaurant. The waiter had Zero interest in us, to the point where, when he would talk to us, he would always be looking elsewhere in the restaurant. When asked how a Rose champagne was, his response was “(pause)Awesome!” Looking for a little better description there, champ.
- Booze: oh man, I never want to see booze again… until next weekend.
Overall a very fun trip. I did a lot of Traditional Vegas Stuff™ that I normally never do, and the gambling went well enough to cover a good portion of the stuff we did. Next trip: let’s do a bigger group. HOLLLLAIR.
cAL: I went and looked at that coachella site you linked to. Fuck that place, it has more rules than even the House of Rules in Markesan, WI.
Check this out:
you’re right sounds like a drag. still a great lineup.
When coming to Vegas, remember:
Hey if your looking for a bigger group next time, let me know and I will be there.
Ok.
I’m gonna order one of these. Why? The Future, homey.
New York City shines in frosted relief against a mirrored surface with our promise: We Will Never Forget. Then, in a second disctint striking the stunning skyline of the twin towers is inset with jewler precision, able to rise up into a breathtaking standing sculpture.
Who wrote this? Some genius! Seriously, they are going to sell a million of this coin that is also a second standing sculpture. Very impressive. i love that you are “limited to” five! buy five buy five buy five buy five buy five… hmmm “five” a strange word. five five five five five buy five buy five buy five buy five buy five.
huh how many? no more than FIVE!
i love that a building that doesn’t even exist anymore has a coin with jewler precision and cal can’t even get his mug on the junko penny.
wow… that inset really fits in their precisely… who made that? like a master coin maker or something?
no. a jeweler.
oh… so you can wear it?
no.
oh.
?
?
whoops. i meant there, cal. don’t yell at me.
not to take anything away from you, the coin, or the inset, but… i came into that post with an injury.
wha happened?
Pinky?
pug attack?
asthma attack
?
ball cancer?
giant zit on my forearm
thanks for that pleasant image you… you…
SD was beautiful… perfect wheather and some spectacular views.
corranado: must
la jolla: must
CMB: platinum plus
thanks again w-whazz. rach-o says thanks too… BG, you missed EVERYTHING! where did you go out in boca? max’s grille? i peed on that place once a long time ago.
sorry cal. this fucking giant zit keeps throwing my balance off and pressing keys as it flops from side to side of my arm.
i don’t care. lily allen is my friend.
hey our randoms never contacted us huh.
what’s that like?
oh well
sweet love.
wow… double love.
whazzmaster.com: a burlesque show got drunk and smashed into a fliipty-floppity-gymnastics show light pole doing 125
thats a good one. i got one…
Whazzmaster.com: Double Love
i miss vegas & feel that 3 days is just not enough. i got that triple love for vegas. maybe i’ll drag madd’s stankin ass there this weekend. pussy.
i want to go there this weekend….
the mega millions jackpot is 370 million. the odds are 175 million:1.
at what point should countries look at these lotteries as a smart investment bet and buy out all the combinations at the risk of splitting the jackpot?
i think the government should buy out all the combinations and put the winnings towards early education programs like head start and porno.
that girls gone wild guy should do it as a promotional stunt. it’s fits his character profile perfect.
Buy 2 tickets and your odds are still favorable. 370 million? That’s a lotta dimp.
When the scent of roasting marshmallows or hotdogs enters my nose it achieves nothing but make me feel hungry for that roasted and toasted campfire food. Delicious!
A++
egg salad sanwiches make me want to eat pickles
off to good ol’ cas-see-no ariz-zoh-no for their delicious $25,000 added bad beat jackpot (which was hit last time i went) and aces cracked wins a rack and shrimp fried rice and beer! cal, they have tofu beer for you.
haters came into wisconsin and we broke them off
suck it in suck it in suck it in like your car just got seized with a rin tin tin
back from the deep deep south of florida. lots of fun. other stories to follow.
Where are the Vegas photos?????????? I demand some now.
The pics are on my machine, but not uploaded yet. I’ll try to get some going this afternoon/evening.
thanks it will be the highlight of my first day back to work.
whazzman, you see you can get zuma on your ipod for $4.99?
it’s fucking 2007!
4nyay is in town and we’re going boozin! plan if i get stupor drunk: tell people we just got 4th in the “dunes 250″ race.
i bet daniel hinkle would fucking love that. seems a little H.S.T.y, and dinkle loves that shit. so sayeth cal, so believeth meeth.
dan, what happens in mario 3 when you warp whistle in the warp zone?
did you say you get a free life? YOU’RE RIGHT!
my little secret pony: the dunes 250 doesn’t even exist as far as i know! but as far as i know, IT DOES! 250 seems about the right length for an event over roughish terrain. dunes says it all… so dunes 250… that sounds right. it probably does exist. it very well could have just happened this past weekend, i mean, the weather was perfect. man, and these dudes got 4th? CAL!
i hope there is a picture of you on the roof of the rio, wearing a ridiculously shiney shirt, doing the big-al point with a brightly illuminated moon, the light beam from the luxor, a palm tree leaf, and 3 sluts in the background. spacebee’s in a g doing the lil’ kim pose on a pile of 100s she assumably was rolling around on as many have stuck to her exsposed skin. doyle bruson is visible and he has a lasso.
assumedly? presumably? man i’m dumb. this liquor’s got a hold of me.
Ho man, dude, you had everything right ‘cept I was wearing a white sweater. Pictures uploading to Flickr now, should be available in the morn. Dude, seriously, have fun with 4nyay. Steal some bongs and shit.
Dear Lord, it’s that little doll.
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