The past two days have been Dude Central at my place. My brother drove up from Racine on Tuesday and that night him, myself, and wwhazz played in the aforementioned poker tourney.
This week was ok, not great. Wwhazz busted out first (he was feeling ‘fuzzy’) and my brother lasted until right after the second break. I went out 16th, just after we broke down to two tables. When we hit four tables, I was chip leader at the table, but from four to two tables my stack stayed exactly the same while everyone else built up mountains of chips. This resulted in me running some plays to try to pick up blinds (not all at once or anything, maybe two plays in 45 minutes). Both times I did it, the blinds woke up with AK and pocket pair, respectively. At the time we hit two tables, I had horrible table image due to no quality showdowns + the bad plays that I had to give up on. So, with the 1000-2000 blinds about to hit me and a stack of ~6500 chips I just pushed with K8 and got called by TT. Say lah vee.
I ventured upon my brother and wwhazz playing the 1-2 NL game. My first hand: KK. I took some money from wwhazz with his AQ, but the rest of the table showed me respect. A couple of hands later I raised it up with JJ (not nearly enough though) and pushed ($65-ish) on the T83 flop. One dude called with his 8T offsuit that he called my raise with, and my bro called with nut flush draw. Brother rivered the flush; good for him. That was it for me. Wwhazz was begging me for booze $$ by the end.
My bro and me also played two rounds of golf: nine holes at university Ridge on Wednesday morning and 18 at Odana Hills this morning (Thursday). Yesterday was pretty fun; even when you’re sucking hind tit at the Ridge, at least it’s beautiful. I beat my brother pretty soundly, but he was having a really off day. We went out later and got him his early birthday present: a fancy new driver… which he used to whip the holy living fuck out of me on the golf course this morning. I four-putted the first hole, and then flung my putter about 100 yards towards the next tee box. I proceeded to play the worst round of my life, yet at some point in the middle I made eagle on a 460 yard par 5. By the back nine I was in a bad mood again, and lost 6 balls on the 15th hole, Joe Pesci-style (“Hit me. [face card] Fuck you. Hit me. [face card] Take that fucking card, and shove it up your ass. Hit me. [face card]“). I feel kinda foolish for acting a fool, but whatever, I fucking four-putted. Ride or die.
This weekend is All Crazy, All The Time. The Sausage Rage is Saturday, and I wouldn’t be surprised if our award for finishing is an ice-pick in the balls. Anything To Fuck You Over: that’s the Milwaukee Brewer’s promotional model. I guess we should have guessed that they wouldn’t take success that well. I mean, they’ve got groups-of-twenty-five-or-more tickets to sell, why should they give a fuck about the people who were buying the tickets and going to the sausage race when only 2000 hobos attended a weekday game?
Sunday my family is going to the game since my dad got the company tickets. I’ll hollar and yell at Barry Bonds for all of you. Afterwards is a family pic-a-nic. Should be fun, whazzmaster.com. HOLLLLARIT.
Cal- I am sorry to hear about your absence from this weekend. What kind of illness do you have? Are you in the hospital? If you need a nurse I know a realy good one, her name is Spacebee. She’s real good with the fat old men that are obsessive compulsive about their milk of magnesia. She could take good care of you. Also how is your lady friend? I hope she is well because I had a fun time visiting with her and sometime in the next millenium when wwhazz and I don’t shop at goodwill we would like to come out and visit you two.
Today starts the streak of six days off of work for me. I have been looking forward to it. This weekend has fallen apart a good amount from what I thought it would be but with my ever positive attitude I think much fun can and will still come from it. I am going to call the brewers reight now and ask if my friend spacebee can be let into the race somehow, even if someone else has to die to let her in. Their are loads of fun tenative plans, hang out with my old roommates Meg and Spacebeee????? Hang out with the Mannetters????? Sit and love my husband and my dog?????? Brewer game with standing room only????? A HOuse Warming party???? The only tings set in stone are the sausage race and upnorth to Crandon on Sunday through Weds. Wow I can’t wait to get up to that peice of heaven. Lake Metonga here we come!!!! Parker’s virgin time upnorth, should be interresting, will he like the pntoon boat or hate it? We will see
MADD?
Went and looked at some office space today. Not sure whether I’ll sign a lease yet.
The Professional Centre is office space with shared support services. Designed for individual and multiple users, The Professional Centre is poised to serve small businesses that value the amenities of large office space, but can’t justify the overhead that’s associated with it.
Good thing it’s poised. good thing it’s a Centre. i can’t justify the hate that’s associated to the professional centre. hatehatehatehate i wish i was there to spread the hate in person. especially to A. O’neil CHILD OF MAN
Hey, anyone wanna move up north and live in a yurt with me?
i would never puss out of a beer bong like that.
why do you need office space? would intuit pick up that bill? can i be your poised janitor?
also, i’m not THAT fatt.
also, i can do windows.
Wow, interesting conversation in the booth during the brewers game. Bob Costas is in town covering the Bonds thing, and he was in the booth for an inning talking to Schroeder and Anderson. Costas used to broadcast baseball games with Uke back in the day, and mentioned that sometimes Uecker would do two commentaries: one for the radio, and one that wouldn’t make the radio for those in the booth. I guess they used the dump button a lot on Uke back in the day. That makes me happy, and while they were talking about it they cut to a shot of Uecker in the booth and he was looking like an alcoholic uncle in a Titlist hat.
Also, will whoever is playing classical music at volume 27 outside my window please fucking stop?
are you sure costas didn’t just watch major league 2?
perhaps costas is falling apart… man… i remember uke… yeah… at county stadium, home of the indians… yeah… uke was a riot. they had this pitcher named wild thing, and randy quade was some fanatical spectator who chose to allow baseball full reign over his emotional balance…… yeah, and my HBO show… and…… for god’s sake who am i?! WHO IS BOB COSTAS?!
i bet the indians loved the bleacher concessions and toilets… back of county stadium was perfect. miller park is frail infrastructure for frail infrastructures sake. county stadium was solid.
we ordered papa john’s for dinner and poker papa john showed up! we talked for a bit… he was up 1600 last week, but then lost it all and his car broke so he had to borrow 600 to fix it so he could keep delivering pizzas.
sometimes broken capitalism makes me chuckle.
when we ordered i told rach-o about poker papa john and my theory that he doesn’t zreally work for papa johns, but he is just one of the house players that isn’t playing to win, just playing so you don’t win effectively guaranteeing the house every dollar that comes in. but if they did that, they wouldn’t just have everyone look all mafia style like everyone else that works there… people wouldn’t believe it… where is the every man? i never remember the dude smelling at all… and if you are coming in your work clothes from a restaurant… man i remember those days, so he must be a fake papa johns player. nope. dude just gave me a pizza. unless the mafia is so thorough that they actually make him deliver pizzas as a front.
he had to borrow 600………………..
so he could keep delivering pizzas.
cal worthington is the crazy car salesman out in san diego. HE OWNS HIS OWN FINANCE COMPANY!!#%@!#^)(*&@^ his name is cal.
Perhaps (maybe) the Sausage Race results will eventually be here.
i take back some of my bad comments about justin timberlake from the other night. saw him on SNL last night (repeat episode) and the dude is HILARIOUS. two favorite scetches: him as a rapping soup can and his xmas gift skit, “cock in a box”
also, still very up in the air about who should play jessi in the whazzmaster movie special.
maybe jessica biel?
maddddddddddddddddddd c.s.a.
or jessica spannow
how’s about jessica alba…tasty
that is horrible casting. that is why you ain’t c.s.a.
http://www.cs.ualberta.ca/~games/poker/man-machine/Live/
Anyone out there?
wwhazz’s phone has been dead for two days now. still alive? or dead in a ditch?
i’m here. just got back from killing wwhazz and pushing buttons on his cellphone until the battery wore out
juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust kidding. i killed cal.
worthington
oh yeah, dude is up north in un-cell-phonable territory. the crandon mines.
I guess Davey’s job is safe after all:
Grayson in rotation
Jeff Grayson has been hired as host for “Brewers Live” pre- and post-game shows on FSN Wisconsin, the cable channel that produces and airs Milwaukee Brewers telecasts.
Grayson, a graduate of the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee, replaces Ann Carroll, who has been the host of the shows on Brewers road games. Grayson has been a sports anchor for the last 12 years at KMSP-TV, the Fox affiliate in Minneapolis.
FSN Wisconsin management was not dissatisfied with Carroll’s job, according to Brian Peterson, a spokesman for the regional cable network. He said Carroll was holding down the role until a permanent replacement could be found. Carroll’s primary job is to handle a weekly Minnesota Vikings studio show and other Vikings reporting duties for the FSN regional that serves Minnesota.
“The plan all along was to find someone to be that consistent face and we think we have found that with Jeff,” Peterson said Friday.
Grayson has worked at WITI-TV (Channel 6) as a sports producer and at WBAY-TV in Green Bay.
The roles of Craig Coshun and Davey Nelson remain the same on “Brewers Live” for all Brewers home games.
I hate trains.
I hope Yost threatens to stomp on Turnbow’s nuts in the clubhouse after that shit.
Cordero is stone cold awesome. Dude isn’t fazed at all by Griffey’s 394 foot shot to the 395 foot right field wall.
jessica alba for jessi is SOOO not the right actress. whoever suggested that is just going off of name likeness. you are hereby fired as the whazzmaster casting agent.
alright. just took a quick peek at some photos of JW that i have on hand and i’m thinking…call me crazy…sandra bullock. before you discount my assessment, here are my reasons:
1) sassy but soft
2) sex kitten with an edge
3) smart but fun.
i’m sorry but if you have someone better, bring it on. i’m casting sandra bullock for jessi.
also, my new quandary is over casting for katie kalish. don’t know. thinking about blonde literary types. none are coming to mind.
jessica alba
i drop flows like calicos
a ghost town.
old west mining adventure.
ya been here? located in yermo.
google calico and try not to learn slow.
i cheat with idea chains like a kid with a box
a button to press
Badge-A-Matic if you tried that next
tried what? nevermind, i’m just playin with ya mind
tourney chip leader in some technolodgo times
i think sassy BUT soft and smart BUT fun is somewhat racist but enlightened.
they got the same name….wooohooo. alba is the best jessica in the actress market. i’m not goin by who looks like bellgirl…if that is her real name.
did u know they got a white person to play Jesus in the movies. Jesus was not white in real life. He also went to jail. coincidence? i leave that up to u. alba can play jessi
Howza!
Just got back from the mines. Been drinking beer, floating on boats and eating grilled meat since Sunday. Parker came too and he rode in a speed boat and drank half the lake. We also went to Mole Lake and I won 45$ playing BJ. Jess won 33$ on a slut machine. We’ll be back in Madison tonight.
1. I forgot all about Cal W. Have you seen his retro commercial from the 70′s? I really liked that one.
2. Getting Poker Papa John at your house is super lucky. You shoulda taken him in as a pet or butler.
3. Where is Cal cla?
Were you thinking of Poker Papa John when you ordered the pizza or was it a great surprise?
I’m writing a cool song about that guy. It’s called “Poker Papa John (set of nines on the river).”
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRLO!
i didn’t think of dude until 5 minutes before he showed up. then i explained to rachel my theories that he doesn’t really deliver pizzas, and at that point i all but expected it to be him… then he showed up. his $600 loan paid off with a $5 tip.
i won that tourney last night… the $20 late night ploiter multi with 50 people. i also won a seat into the $50 turbo loiter (limit, no pot limit) qualifier into the FTOPS $216 loiter event. i plan on winning both.
got my hands on an iPhone last night (just to look at, not to use or gasp, keep). have to say, now i get the hype. they are pretty freaking amazing. email, stock viewing options, maps, weather, widgets, and more…
1. Justin Timberlake is my #2 crush. Current song obsession: “lovestoned/i think she knows.”
2. Iphone … I don’t get the hype. It’s just a little computer with a phone, right?
3. Cal–don’t you start law school soon? Two words: Emmanual’s Outlines. In the alternative–seven words: save yourself while it’s not too late.
4. Park HS 10 year reunion scheduled for Thanksgiving weekend. Who’s going?
1) Yes I do start law school soon. Three weeks in fact. I am scurred. I took out the hugest loan alive. It is absolutely terrifying. I will invest in Emmanuel’s Outlines post haste. Thanks for the tip Big J.
2) I attended my Ten Years High School Reunion (94 rules!) and I enjoyed myself. It was fun, it gives you perspective to see all those clowns ten years later. I left with the impression that 10 years isn’t a very long time at all. I have a feeling I may skip the next one, I don’t know, maybe I’ll feel differently in 2014 when I can land on the roof in a silver suit and a jet pack!!!
3) My health has returned. I have found The penicillin to be an excellent cure for illness.
4) I don’t have an iphone, but I have massive debt, is that the same thing?
5) heeeeeeeeeeet rayyyyyyyyyyyyyyssssssssssssssssssss du du du
rumthumb, i just read to sandra bullock suggestion and I am flattered. I would love it expecially if she were like the character in Forces of Nature- super sexy.
And as fas as KT Kalish I think Meg Ryan would be appropriate.
Becky Linden and Adam Kristopeit were married … I think last weekend? My mom plays bridge with Adam’s aunt; however, my mom isn’t the most trustworthy messenger.
they got married a sizable while ago
i think early aprilish
tonight at lucky lady = 4 AA, 2 on kill pots, all lost. 4 flopped open ended straight flushes capped on the flop with 3+ people, all lost. 3 flopped top 2 pair, 1 won, 1 lost to a rivered gutshot straight, 1 i won the sidepot but lost the main to the all in player who rivered his 1 out K. pretty shitty night. won 2 decent pots… bah.
who is that skeezer your bro? mp new post please! you’re flopping on the river with this one.
i also flopped 2 sets… 1 won (1 of the decent 2 pots), and one lost a huge pot to runner runner flush. i bet the river and he didn’t raise… i said “nut no flush” and he turned over J2s. so fucking rigged