The Can-do Hotel

Our stay at the Canfield Hotel

Our stay at the Canfield Hotel

Last night we bombed down to the Tri-State area (or is it the Quad Cities?) to have a fine old time at the Canfield Hotel and Diamond Jo’s casino (formerly a riverboat, now a Bellagio-esque resort).

Bottom line: it was the most fun of my goddamned life and I want to go again.

I wrote a review on Google Maps for the Canfield Hotel:

Great place! Affordable rates and it’s real close to the downtown area and the Diamond Jo casino. The native american mannequins in the lobby create a verisimilitude that can’t be matched, and the room was great– clean, with interesting furnishings displaying a love of cats, big and small. After waking from a night of casino action, however, I found out that the weird coffee cups near the coffeemaker had no bottoms and any liquids poured in ended up on the floor. The Rainbow Lounge in the lobby had good folks singing karaoke, too. Long story short, I will definitely stay at the Canfield again.

I gave the place 4 stars; truthfully I wanted to go 4 1/2 stars but Google’s reviews do not afford the reviewer the luxury of half-stars.  Lawman got some pictures of the Native American mannequins so maybe I’ll get those up here at some point; they’re very realistic, inexplicable, and terrifying when you first walk in.

The night was extremely fun and exciting.  It involved roulette, a fun craps session where I had two pretty good rolls, a Blackjack Buttraping, a profitable two rounds of bowling at the Cherry Lanes (apparently the bowling location of choice for recording artist Jewel according the website), some teams of douchebags at the poker tables, and much much more.

The night ended with wwhazz running many blocks to get to an ATM and back before the Rainbow Lounge bar (located in the hotel) closed for the evening.  He almost made it, too!  He also used magic and made pizzas appear right before we passed out.  There was somewhat of a row in the lobby when several gentlemen tried to apparently sneak with us up to our room to get at our pizzas and beer?  I didn’t get it; they weren’t staying in the hotel and we sure as shit didn’t invite them to accompany us.  The last thing I remember is timmer picking up his whole mattress like the incredible hulk and throwing it at me.  Then: poof, I was out like a light.

Short story long: the Canfield Hotel, Diamond Jo’s, and Cherry Lanes get my highest recommendation!  Fun fun fun!

27 Comments

  1. whazzmaster says:

    Oh my god, I gotta get down to San Diego again: Lucha Libre Tacos? Want.

  2. wwzz says:

    What happened to ballin small!?!?!? Fuck!

  3. whazzmaster says:

    Quickly forgotten

  4. bellygirl says:

    How long am I gonna have to look at the retardo picture of my husband? He looks like a “special” puppet that some pervert would talk.

  5. peterstiffly says:

    He looks like that really nice guy who works at the library that you wouldn’t leave your kids alone with for more than 5 minutes.

  6. wwzz says:

    I need way less than 5 minutes to work my magic.

  7. whazzmaster says:

    You’re gonna have to look at it for awhile– I don’t see inspiration striking until after turkey hunting weekend. Hey stiffly, if we do a UFC ppv soon would you wanna join up?

  8. wwzz says:

    What if we want to lock you in a room full of ceramic pumas?

  9. wwzz says:

    Vikings 24 Packers 17

  10. whazzmaster says:

    You realize that you’ve joined Cal, right?

  11. wwhazz says:

    By making a prediction?

    Plus cal hates football.

  12. cal says:

    i love football… i mean favreball. go #4! looking forward to seeing #4 inducted into the football hall of fame wearing his vikes helmet!

  13. whazzmaster says:

    See? I’m leaving to walk to lawman’s place– see you chumps in a bit.

  14. call says:

    uh oh. The hunter has become the vikings bitch

  15. cal says:

    my belligerent trash talk has frozen whazzmaster

  16. Kobet Bryant says:

    I’m back bitchws!!!!!!1

  17. wwhazz says:

    I love it how Michael H(K)unt uses a FRONT PAGE ARTICLE to complain about all the media attention lavished on Favre. Go back to your dungeon in the sports section, troll. You never had a problem using him in the past to sell the shit out of your paper and your stupid Packers Plus section.

  18. whazzmaster says:

    Kobet Bryant is back!

  19. wwhazz says:

    It’s been far too long.

  20. wwhazz says:

    Also, where is madd? Still in Y Ki ki?

  21. wwhazz says:

    Also, expected cal to be here gushing girl dik juice about the twins.

  22. wwhazz says:

    Zach, your hunter safety training is to watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVJH3NYSs-0

  23. wwhazz says:

    The actual instruction doesn’t start until 3:37.

  24. whazzmaster says:

    I am completely not joking: I learned a lot about hunting from Brock Lesnar!

  25. cal says:

    I hate the yankees so so much.

  26. whazzmaster says:

    I talked to CC and he’s none too high on you either.

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