Price is Right Behind the Scenes

Scientist probably already saw this but if not I thought he’d get a kick out of it:

Not much else going on at this point. Just waiting to get old and die.

163 thoughts on “Price is Right Behind the Scenes

  1. yeah, it’s gimmick week. on monday or tuesday he wore some dumb brightly colored camera module on his jacket pocket that took a picture every 30 seconds or something, and posted the images to the price is right homepage. i’ve never been there, so i can’t confirm, but my thought: “DUMB. let’s get to PRICES”

    then, the next day, halfway through the show, he revealed that his glasses, that looked just like the glasses he always wore, had a built in camera and they were streaming video from the glasses on the website. “MORE DUMB! PRICES!!!!!” then, they had behind the scenes day with backstage cameras

  2. what the fuck???? the comments box disappeared and posted the comment.

    #TURDPRESS897!%&*(!%#^(*!^#(&*%!(&*(*&!^#

  3. FUCK THE POLICE

    fucking surveillance state, and you videotape the fucking pigs and they steal your camera by ripping it out of your hands and threaten you with arrest for nothing. “for what?” “you think i make stuff up?”

    you think i think you make stuff up copper? sounds like a guilty conscience. FUCK YOU. DIE SLOW.

    pampa, texas is a police state. the gray county sheriffs are corrupt. BOOM.

  4. butt packer marriage ban deemed unconstitutional… the same constitution that was amended in 2006 to include a butt packer marriage ban.

    WHAT OF THE BUTT CHILDREN?)(&!#%)&*(!#^)&*(!^#

  5. who are the marketing geniouses behind “lenders bagels”?????

    why don’t they sell “usury schmear”?? philadelphia got too much muscle? scurred?

    i’m sure there’s a joke about a full bodied red wine with a “big nose”, but that bagel money is probably enough to ride on for now.

    #BIZNZZZ

  6. just checked tracy morgan’s twitter for any updates on his car crash… i saw pictures of the van… way crushed up, hard to believe anyone would have lived. heard someone else died. anyways, his last tweet, right before the show that he took that same bell-van out to the show: “I’m coming with truck loads of funny”

    TRUCK LOADS. #YOUAINTKIDDIN

  7. god damn it…. benson henderson really did fight on saturday. you said he fought last week and lost, so i saw the fight and was like “RERUN BULLSHIT!(*&%#(*!#%(^*&!%#” so i didn’t watch. but it really was live, and he won.

    to me, benny b is the REAL hendo. who did you think i meant?

  8. ahhh… so DAN henderson is officially “hendo” and benson henderson is officially “smooth”.

    ugg. EVERY DAN IS “DAN THE MAN”. you can’t pick something else. BENSON…. i am going to call you hendo. get used to it. you are not “smooth”. you never were.

  9. i’m getting really sick of all the anti-sexism witch hunting in the tech sector.

    techweek was going to have a large party in chicago… it was going to be formal “black tie”, but also extremely casual / come as you are “rave”… they wanted to get that message across, so they made a flyer with 2 girls dressed in black ties, but dressed like they were going to a “PARTY”… they are things that people have when they aren’t bitching about other people and trying to legislate morality… here is the flyer. everyone went ape shit and the party was cancelled. i guess in these modern enlightened times, a flyer for a party where people will be expected to DANCE, and possibly due to the dance have incidental contact with others…. i guess we should have 2 genderless j’naiis sitting on a bench in flannel looking at their shoes.

    then some guy gives a presentation at a major tech conference and compares a network environment to his nagging girlfriend who doesn’t listen. again, apeshit. everyone fired, restructure the company. this can’t happen. even if your girlfriends nags and doesn’t listen, even if ALL WOMEN nag and don’t listen, NO ONE CAN SAY IT.

    so, there is this new car cleaner spray ad on TV… it’s pretty bad… like those carl’s jr burger ads with naked girls on cars eating burgers… now i support those companies even if their products suck. way to go people who complain… now, because of your complaining, i empower those who you would complain about. WAIT. are you guys just tricking me??? do you REALLY want more sexism, but just preach against it??? sort of like the catholic boy rapers?? oh man. i’m so dumb. i feel for it again.

    #BUTTHURT

  10. Oneezy signed some dude named Lonnie for $0 last night. Today he provides this line:
    5/5, 3 dingers, 9 RBI

    That’s a good start to the week.

  11. uggg… came here to post something genious. then i saw your shit… now i don’t remember. so painful.

  12. i was rubbing in dan the man santan the dan’s first at bat homer on the sisters, and wzzzzzzzz shut me up quick with lonnie’s line. cla snaps his guys 3 HR days too… shit never happens to my losers. i think i am going to take one of them and torture them in front of the others. you HIT, or you GET hit.

    #SLAVE

  13. last second bench of boyd so i miss out on grand slam. thanks, diligence. FUCK YOU, O’BAMO

    boyd was tranding down, and kemp was trending up, and st00000pid whzzzzzzz put pretty big value on kemp, so now i question my short term hatred of him. GIVE HIM THE SHOT. boyd retorts, “FUCK YOU”. FUCK YOU, BOYD&()!#%)&!#%)&( YO MAMMA CAN’T EVEN SPELL BODY RIGHT, JERK()&*#%!&)*(!#%^)&*(!#%~

  14. his name is byrd. even dumber. fly away, BITCH)&#!%^)&(!#^)(*&!^#

    i love you, please don’t go. i need your homers. i’m so sorry. i’ll play you every day from now on as you go 2/20 with 1-2 HRs over and over again. bitter sweet homie. you’ll be begging for a spot in the northwoods league when i’m done with you. BENCH)(&!#%^)&*(!#^

  15. T.J. Miller is the regime, and “Silicon Valley” is top tier entertainment.

    #ENDOFLINE

  16. You want side action, bro?

    Think you can take young tim? I can’t think of anything else to offer. There is no one lower.

    #suckfuck

  17. how’s the air up their on your 102.5 point mountain? seems to be going to your head.

    you want a twank on young tim, you got it.

  18. just read that lonnie’s 5/5 3HR 9RBI game was the first in baseball history. some guys had 5 hits, 3 HR, 9 RBI, but they had more than 5 at bats.

  19. i hope my new young ace CHASE WHITEY rips some heat tonight. also hope my other slaves can rally behind his name and work up some HOPE and motivation to win and make something of themselves… otherwise, UP FOR SALE. go make nikes in guatemala, JERKS)*(&^#!)(&*!^#)*(&!^)*(!^

  20. brewer game was fun today… front row on the aisle… a couple of 30-something jews out on a date. man and a woman. the kind of combination capable of procreating the human population. the “good” kind? #butdatoverpopulation

    anyways… they show up a little late… a few hitters in. all the other “diamond box” seats are taken. they have the spectacle featured seats, and they’re making a spectacle entrance. right as they sit down, a pop fly foul. the jew male’s eyes are instantly diverted to the flying object worth more than an hours hard labor above minimum wage up for public grabs. good hit. contact. impressive. hitting balls… flyin freebies… eyes back to date lady who is very attractive, yet overly aware of the spectacle they are creating. she sinks in her chair. he looks back out.

    later, there is a rain delay… but it’s very short… 3 minutes.. like shortest ever, but it was 11th inning, super late on a work night, and everyone else went home, but back come humanities hope. both of them. back to seat #1 and #2. this is our BIG night. i bought the BIG seats. we’re not leaving. they were the only people behind the plate left.

    the guy is getting a little agitated, like she told him they weren’t going to bang, but ditching the game at the rain delay was the move to bang town, so it was pretty obvious.

    gotta think ahead, homie.

    #JDATE

  21. badger mutual claims i can find support in “just 5 keystrokes” implying i just submit my ZIP code… but really i have to type in the URL, click, click, click, THEN input the “5 keystrokes”, but, even assuming they ignore all that earlier shit, i still have to submit the form… pressing enter would consist of entering a 6th keystroke.

    LYING IN ADVERTISING.

    CAN I SUE?!

  22. Chill out, bro. Do some yoga:

    Former WWE Star Diamond Dallas Page will be in attendance on June 4th as part of Yoga Night presented by MINI of Madison. Fans can go on the outfield post-game for yoga led by Diamond Dallas Page, who is a yoga instructor with his own yoga videos.

  23. i’ve been doing yoga all day… slept funny on my arm last night… nerves all fucked up, so holding weird ass stretches. i know my body, coach. i can rip.

    #PUTMEIN

  24. parenting pro tip: instead of telling your kid to go to bed, tell them to PRETEND to go to bed. pretty high no-sass success rate.

    #KIDHACK

  25. just turned on “mickey mouse clubhouse”…. kid said, “i’m too old for this”

  26. chappelle came out of his block party cave and talk to letterman about money.

    he seems hung up on the fact that guys with $100M in the bank eat at the same restaurants as guys with $10M in the bank. WHAT ELSE ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH MONEY, OTHER THAN PAY PEOPLE TO SERVE YOU FOOD?

    #MESSAGE

  27. i’m shopping for a trailer park lot. living the dream. $25,000 and you’re a king.

    #RICKY

  28. My dead grandma owned a trailer. Way baller. Now it’s owned by my mom or aunt or grandpa or someone. I hope it one day lands in my hands.

    That thing is in a trailer park in West Allis. The trailer, lot, and park are all in bad decline. It’s pretty much the perfect place to have a perfect life full of fun and adventure.

    This mushroom grow story happened there. Please read the entire story. It is worth your time:

    http://www.jsonline.com/news/crime/man-investigated-for-growing-mushrooms-in-west-allis-trailer-park-dg4bfj6-140505803.html

    Here is where it is on google maps. It looks like the pussy ass google truck was too scared to drive the street view mobile in there, but you can kinda get a look.

    https://www.google.com/maps/place/10315+W+Greenfield+Ave+%23550/@43.013774,-88.041148,17z/data=!3m1!4b1!4m2!3m1!1s0x8805056fdfec3bf5:0x4514645480183a60

  29. that is a crowded city dump. i’m looking at more campground settings on mirror lake in the dells.

  30. how did kwik trip get so cheap this year??? last year, go to ryan braun’s fancy pants restaurant, hang out, then go to a game and watch from the box and get another visit from him in the box.

    this year: go to dinner with lucroy and some chili’s dump, get a baseball and kwik trip gift card for fitty damn ducks. that’s it. GOOD DAY, SIR.

    luc is the best. cal sucks.

  31. they run 1000 ads a day that probably each cost more than the entire prize. total fucking joke.

  32. There is some fine urban spelunking opportunities behind that trailer park. And good shroom and meth cooks. A nice hobo drinking camp back by the train tracks. I saw a fox back there one time.

  33. yeah, just looked TOO urban. you’re always 20′ from a building of some kind.

    i want woods and waters. even a shitty field and a drainage ditch would be ok, but grandma dead’s place looks like they paved paradise and put up a parking lot.

  34. you do have a bowling alley just over the railroad tracks and past the divided highway… thats like a canfield to jo’s run. and “central park” is just past the freeway. i hear the shakespear plays are pretty good there in the summer…. but it get’s busy… the bridge and tunnel crowd flock that shit and ruin it for us locals.

  35. shit, county zoo is less than a mile… basically living right downtown milwaukee.

    fucking milwaukee city cops… i’ve got a whole bunch in the extended family… all great people. hornets are pretty fucking great too… huge. big ass wings… cool colors on a head that looks like a racing helmet. then the fuckers sting you for no reason. SWAT SWAT. they S.W.A.T. back…. #BOOM

  36. i want a place out in bumfuck. a place i could plant fields of cabbage and mountain lions would come and take their share.

  37. i just found out that those checkpoints don’t count as illegal stop & search because the police announce the location an hour before they go there… so it’s on you to constantly listen to whatever outlets the police use, and then it’s your fault if you get stopped because they put an ad on diklist.org saying they would be there.

    someone will eventually see the light and do the right thing.

    #BOOM

  38. good show wisco.

    feeenix and san heezy were turrrrrible. diego and seattle both had them too… throw in the fuckhead border patrol and that’s a whole other problem. probably good to let michigan keep the UP so wisco state law doesn’t get invaded by federal border laws. i only see 3 international ports: green bay, milwaukee, raycilla… so border patrol is already infested. get them out.

  39. i saw a recent story of some mayor election where the guy basically ran a campaign on shutting down a police force that was militarizing itself and harassing citizens. the police chief went to the after party at a bar where the DJ played “FUCKED THE POLICE”.

    the chief went apeshit and demanded they turn it off. they didn’t. he said he never heard of the song and felt that it was criminal. OF COURSE YOU DO, DIKHEAD. FUCK YOU. wait until he finally catches up to the 90’s and hears ice-t’s cop killer. and now he plays a cop on TV???? ILLEGAL! SEND HIM TO GUANTANAMO!(*!#%^(^*!#%(*&!#%^

  40. Checking the original testimony in the court case of N.W.A v. Police Department (Judge Dre residing), it did seem like MC Ren, Ice Cube, and Eazy Mothafuckin’ E make some cogent points about the police. Essentially, they argue, fuck ‘em.

    #funny

  41. rotoworld note for machado:

    It’s not exactly ideal timing considering his recent suspension and overall struggles this season, but Orioles third baseman Manny Machado has his own brand of salsa coming out.

    THANKS FOR THE HELP(&*!%#*(&)!#%)*(&!#%^

  42. thinking about shaving my head and coloring it in like ricky did randy’s.

    just drunk enough to see absolutely no downside.

    #OPENTOSUGGESTION

  43. ice-t’s band body count, famous for the cop killer song, is back touring. they were on conan last night, and it was GREAT. i watch EVERY SHOW ON TELEVISION (except the tonight show, because fuck leno), but music acts are about 95% suck. most of the problem is live music shows don’t translate well to TV or to TV show studio audiences, and all the guitar players are nervous, and it’s generally bad. ICE came out and killed it. (a cop)

  44. this world cup game is weird…. all the fans have “HELLA” written on their face.

    hella dumb, more like.

    #GREECEVSIVORYCOAST

  45. front-row amy sold her ticket to an insane person in a superman costume. will smith just blew a hold in the 8th for my fantasy man yo. i blame superman.

    if you see him in the streets => #KRYPTONITE

  46. the latest attack ads against mary burke are hypnotizing… they are trying to paint her as someone that is costing wisconsin money, so they put her face on all the cards… like queen of hearts… cards flying all over the place… chips everywhere… mary burke is the best… i LOVE mary burke.

    i think the ad has words in it, but i never took the time to ingest them.

    THANKS FOR BEING AWESOME MARY BURKE!!! SEE YOU AT THE TABLES*()&!%&*)(!%#^(&*!%(&*!^%

  47. FUCK THE POLICE

    good enough to be exploited through slavery for their own nefarious means… worthless enough to shoot in the head for no reason while trespassing during a search for a boy who was asleep in his own house.

    #FUCKEMFUCKEM
    #DIESLOW
    #ALLOFTHEM
    #BOOM

  48. I removed the website field but it’s not gonna help anything. It’s not like the spammers have people filling out webforms- they just submit directly to the form handler.

    I wipe out the spam when I have the time, but very little gets through to the site (there were 28,000 comments held for moderation when I just looked).

  49. it works the same as telemarketers… once a single spam gets through, the robots are able to detect that and focus their powers and tell other robots that you’re vulnerable.

  50. i was in the cilla last weekend for my cousins wedding… spent LOTS of time drunk as shit shooting the shit with the copper posted out front of the reception hall. scorched earth tactics. waste their time. make them hate their jobs and their lives. attrition.

    #FUCKEM

  51. so, the telemarketers are changing their tactics… now they say “you’re caller number 20 in line to speak to a representative” but then you get someone after 15 seconds or so. just enough time to open up the text file on my desktop containing this:

    you are currently operator number… 12, in line for a public shaming. your estimated shame-level is… 9. thank you for your shame.

    then, i highlight the text and press option-esc… if your mac has accessibility turned on, that will speak any text you highlighted in a robot voice.

    my war of attrition is working. the scammers don’t hang up until the very end. sometimes they stick around… “is someone there? hello?” then i hit them with the option-esc again.

    #THANKYOU

  52. another fun hobby is checking in on the craigslist sluts… almost all of them explicitly say “no black guys”… some leave a backhanded apology, “sorry, but no black guys”.

    craig, you so crazy. keep hustling that racism to get the realtor and car dealership money.

    CAN I SUE?!#*()&%!&)*(#%

  53. today, i was king of the boys at the community high dive… 10 of us lads were in line, sharing tales of springboard heroism. “DO A FLIP!”, “i did a flip, but i hurt my side, so i’m not doing it again”… the kid behind me in line is obviously the alphadik, “that’s nothing… i hurt my side 7 times”. all the flips were off the 1m board… no one would even consider that off the high dive. i stood quiet. these young lads had no idea what i was considering. i was about to fulfill a lifelong dream. i had the physics all worked out. my turn comes and i take a step. so far, everything is where it’s supposed to be. arms are swinging back.

    another step, this time with a slight bounce. feels good.

    my arms reach apogee and shoot towards the sky, all systems go… we’re jumping, baby.

    a quick glance at the landing zone… right where it’s supposed to be. arms coming down hard, knees ready to explode. the springboard absorbs my massive awesomeness… for less than a moment, i understand EVERYTHING.

    WEEEEEEEEE… jesus, take the wheel… it’s time to fly. well… it’s now or never… i pull a pike to gauge my traj… then bust an inverted jackknife into a head first toothpick. so awesome.

    kingkiddik is up on the board as i surface “WHOA!!! HOW DID IT FEEL!”

    sorry, kid, i got more important people to talk to… people that can bust head first tricks off the big board.

    i walk away.

    #TRAJ

  54. blackpeoplemeet.com proves that segregation is preferred. we shall hear no more of reparations.

    isn’t that what jail is for?

    #IAMTERRIBLE

  55. best part about those racist craigsluts…. THEY ARE PROBABLY POLICE STING OPERATIONS.

    also, pretty sure blackpeoplemeet.com was run by the white woman that invented tinder, so pretty much all around assholes.

    #BLACKHOLES

  56. i’m pretty sure i could do a flip on a dirtbike.

    step 1: ride a dirtbike for the first time ever
    step 2: BE A MAN

  57. 1. Your life gives me so much joy.
    2. Put BJ on trubbs for me
    3. I know of a tree lined stadium that is perfect for sports based challenges if you want to try that bike thing

  58. i used to do lots of inward and reverse dives as a kid… then i saw greg louganis slam his head on the board doing a reverse, and got scared i would turn gay if i tried again.

    i’m going to work on my 1 1/2 front flip off the 1m board.

  59. knowing that my life gives even a single person joy puts dreams of reverse swan dives in my head.

    WHY WOULDN’T YOU DO A REVERSE SWAN DIVE?!(*&#^*(^&!#*&(

  60. everyone in the diamond box seats for the last few days has been wearing the “BREW CREW” shirts they are giving away on friday. a nice promotion.

    today, the only person who didn’t put on the shirt is front row amy. what a bitch. she isn’t a team player. she’s a succubus witch.

  61. these spammers are pissing me off. fantasy baseball is pissing me off. also, today a chipmunk came in my porch… i went to shut to outside door to enslave him so we could get to know each other before i let him loose…. he ran out last minute and i clipped his tail in the sliding door…. chopped off the last 1/4″ of his fluffy tail… just barely the actual tail part with blood, but damn… i feel bad.

    also, many conference calls with indian developers.

    read whazzmans tweets about a bad day coding tooltips.

    today sucks.

    tomorrow, bro. tomorrow is the key.

    where is jen h? I NEED A RUN IN(*!#&%)&(!#%)&(!#%()^*!#%

  62. These spammers are some of my best friends. Fantasy baseball is making me rich. Timmer put some mouse poison in my garage and a chipmunk ate it. I felt neutral about it.

    It’s been ages since I’ve been a part of a conference call though I saw a really fat Indian kid at the splash pad today.

    My twittering is limited to Norm Macdonald, freecashwi, and fantasy baseball.

    Today was really nice. Sorry, bro.

  63. ITT Tech ad: “we TRULY believe education CAN be good for this country”

    it’s good you TRULY believe, and not just believe… because then when you say that it “CAN” be good, it’s all the more clear what you’re really saying: it’s not always good, and probably isn’t currently good… you know… the currently where ITT tech has been in business for the last 70 years.

    thanks for that “skills gap” you’re complaining about…. these god damn “institutes” are pissing me off.

    #LIGHTAMATCH

  64. oh man, i got stuck in a youtube rabbit hole the size of my dik on idiots complaining about college.

    what a waste of time.

    my favorite are the people that simultaneously preach the “you have to get a degree to make a lot of money” while they complain that the degree costs a lot of money.

    smelt caught in the net.

    #FILTERNOTAPRESS

  65. here is a good spot to start….
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqx0CRJFAXg#t=596

    2 books from a going out of business book sale… which will keep him living “decently” for 8-10 years. you know, factoring this economy, factoring whats coming in the world, much less in this country. 8-10 years. GUARANTEED. THESE 2 BOOKS.

    #NOTSCHOOL
    #FRIDAYNIGHTPARTY

  66. “lesbian bulldyke teacher for sociology” that is just gold. WHOOOOOOOOOSH.

    way to learn the lesson, homie.

    #ILOVEYOU

  67. while defending his “you can just buy books to learn” theory, he claims that only lawyers and doctors should go to college. oh man. LAWYERS. a profession literally defined by written law… written in law BOOKS. that’s the law. there it is. you’re done. THOSE MORONS SHOULD STILL GO TO COLLEGE… but not me… i just do “computers”. one time my grandma’s internet went out, and i deleted a windows registry error that i found on google. i could make a career about fixing other peoples shitty software that breaks all the time and creates jobs for people like me…. like that 5th element guy with the plastic head shield. HE’S ALWAYS HIRING.

    #USAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSAUSA

  68. fuck the brewers

    fuck baseball

    PUT ME IN COACH(*&#!%&*()%!#(&*!#%(&*&*(!#%&*(!#%*&(!#%

  69. Hmmm… that is too cheap. There has to be something way wrong. It’s an amusement company– they, of all people, would know the value. I’m interested, but skeptiCAL.

  70. playing surface looks a little bubbly… those old machines have a shitty return mechanism… the scoreboard might have a light out… it basically looks like the exact one in the back of that state st bar next to the garbage.

    $200 seems about right for that one.

    i could get you black and yellow stinger model with the overhead scoreboard for $650… like brand new looking.

  71. 8′ pro style dynamo play surface is 51.5″ x 99.5″… stinger is 46″ x 86″… so 5″ shorter on each player’s square. 2.5″ on each side. i guess that matters…

  72. Yeah. Those smaller tables kinda suck.
    I actually played some air hockey on Saturday. One crazy fatal 4 way match with a construction worker, a super fat man with a hands free blue tooth thing in his ear and a 7 year old Asian girl. It was some goofy Dave and busters square table with goals on each side. It was mostly me v construction guy but I slapped a few goals in on fatty and the kid too so she didn’t feel left out. After the game me and constructo had a battle on a real table and I beat him 2 games to zip. It was good to play.

  73. My first shot on constructo was a hard straight shot right in the goal. He said, good shot. You must of played a lot as a kid. I was like, bro. I played a lot as an adult.

  74. you need to check out the arcade by my crib… whazzman too… every decision they made strikes me as TOO right. i take that shit serious, and it makes me maddddddddd that they probably did things better than i would have, without many remodels (which they have probably done over the last 10+ years… but seeing it now, way perfect)

    that is the place with sleepover rooms for 8 year olds with bunk beds and an air hockey table in the middle… pizza delivered to the room. BOTTLE SERVICE, BRO.

    they have indoor batting cages and indoor go karts. lazer tag… kankakee bowling… bumper cars… a fucking climbing wall. the bar is separate… in between the arcade area and the indoor water park. like walmart of family entertainment. TOO GOOD(*%&*(!#%*)&&*)!#%

  75. latest ITT tech ad, “if there’s one thing we know…”

    THEY MIGHT NOT KNOW A SINGLE THING.

    #IDIOTS

  76. pizza putt putt is new… basically my dream for a couple years, and someone else is developing it, and will probably fail hard… not sure though… i’m watching it hard.

    the place i’m talking about is next door… HUGE. vacant lots all around. dells lite. but if idiots would rather play in a cement box off the interstate than go canoeing around the glacier lakes, we can build cement boxes right here.

    people stay in the hotel there all the time… the problem is, they seriously have EVERYTHING… why would you leave? noah’s ark is going strong… why open up family land across the street??? if you build it, they will come, homie. get jack spinning up some pies… we have a course to design.

  77. yo cal, i was in the chaw line today… old guy behind me chirps up after i order, “hey, that’s what i’m in line for”. instant best friends. they he gets serious, “have you heard about high mountain?”

    oh shit… pretty sure i’m getting recruited to a cult… but no, he goes on that he saw an ad on the outdoors channel, and it’s some new tobacco-free organic herbal chaw.

    i just said, “WHY?”, then left.

  78. LCO casino has a new promotion that requires you to put on some racist indian mustache to be eligible for the prize.

    CAN I SUE?

  79. the world poker tour now has a few new brands “Alpha 8″, basically a bunch of young doucebags that buy into psychologiCAL constructs. you’re a d00d, and you suck. it should be called the “suck d00d 8″. whatever, it sucks.

    then, they have “Premier League”…. uh… there already is a “Premier League”… it’s soccer, you idiots. you’re blatantly infringing. but then, just to make sure everyone knows they are assholes, during the show they advertise for the competing guiness international soccer league.

    seriously cal… get off your ass and sue some people. take all of mike sextons money. that jerk. vince van gurldik too. take all his haircare money. he sucks.

  80. mike sexton likes to blatantly lie…. “give me $20 a month to enable you to play poker for cash winnings, and i guarantee you’ll never lose a dime playing poker”

    uh… yeah… i didn’t lose a dime… i lost $20. i lose $20 every month. the only prizes are $10,000 entry fees to poker tournaments that you run and also compete in.

    if aereo is illegal, mike sexton deserves the death penalty.

    justice is a hilarious illusion.

    #BUYGUNS

  81. i’m pretty sure next season, WPT will have “World Poker Tour – National Football League”, but only let soccer players from the same european nations enter the tournaments… new nation every week. they call it football. WE’RE IDIOTS.

  82. i dream of one day being charged RE: whazzmasterbation, and, in court, forcing the entirety of comments attributed to me be read allowed as they pertain to audience, purpose, and context.

    fuck the game, don’t let the game fuck you.

    seriously. fuck “The Game”. the artist, the michael douglas suspense thriller motion picture, and the BET television show.

    “what’s on… what. is. on. scroll scroll scroll… THE GAME! michael douglas. yeah, i could do that. FUCKING BET. ALWAYS RUINING SHIT. disco opened but just lasssss week(!#%&()*&!#%'”

    almost every day. makes me so madddddddddddddd.

  83. ALLOWED?(!#*%&(*&!#^ jesus. i’m insane. ALOUD.

    THEIR, I SAID IT. THEY’RE)&*(!%#)&(!#%)&(!#%)&*(!#%

  84. understanding the T.S.A. is not security theatre, and is only there because YOU PEOPLE ARE FUCKING STUPID, is very calming.

    #STUPIDFUCKS

  85. maybe old guy was talking about smokey mountain tobacco free chaw…

    maybe he just said “high” and “tobacco free” because he was offering to sell me weed. shit. i always figure these things out way to late.

    #RICKYBRAIN

  86. TOO LATE)(&*%#!)&(*!%#)&*(!#%)&(*!#%)&()*(!#^%

    TYPOMACHINE)(*&!@%)&*(#!%^)&*(!#%^)&(!#^%)(&*!#%^*()_#%!*()_!%#^

    A MACHINE THAT ONLY MAKES TYPOS)(*&#%!)&*(!#%^()*&!#^%)&*(!^#

  87. got in a really good telemarketer performance in front of the wifey today. same chick has called every day for 2 weeks, and i’ve hit her with the robot every time. time to reward the perseverance. i wouldn’t presume she was a “black chick”, but she talked exactly like a stereotypical black chick would talk. slightly older black father stereotype? check! i brought in “instagram” for the first time ever and kept her on the line for 5 minutes. she never broke. how could she. #daddyissues

    my last words were “you know…. i like to play.”

    she stood silent for 10 seconds, then hung up.

    wifey cracked up silently. laughter isn’t always about the HA HAs. #MESSAGE

  88. here’s the thing on pizza putt putt. i’ve never gone there. WHY WOULD I? why support the enemy, even if it’s the enemy of the enemy you want to exploit in the same way the original enemy exploits the latter enemy?

    family land worked because they had an insurance man’s nightmare of a slide. i’ve jumped off 50′ cliffs and been less endangered. multiple swimsuits torn apart… airborne over cement within a barely sided tube of life. FEAR.

    so, you just need a gimmick.

    gimmick #1: jack’s pizza. it’s not a gimmick… it’s your new life.

    gimmick #2: drone lazer tag. all the drones have first person camera views, and you fly around a multi-leveled area full of other drones. safety mechanisms, similar to the safety mechanisms in the go karts to prevent crashes by disabling driver inputs, would make flight easy enough for a child. a viewing grandstand would allow spectators to watch everything and gather up enough quarters to have their turn.

    once pizza putt putt goes under, i’ll buy them out cheap.

  89. i changed my telemarketer text to:

    you are currently operator number… 4, in line for a public shaming. your estimated shame-level is… 18. thank you for your shame.

    #EXPERIMENT

  90. brewnog is in the market for a 9mm handgun… texting frenzy… he says you can’t buy them in madison. is that true? why do you sissy cowards let this happen to you? you deserve all the police beatings you receive. everyone knows that criminals can’t drive 5 miles.

    #IDIOTS
    #BOOM

  91. ZING!

    i had already planned to bring that up. he was already complaining he couldn’t buy a gun online, and comparing that to the government not allowing tesla to sell directly to consumers… dealerships have spent years buying politicians… tesla was busy inventing everything the government uses to oppress you. WHOOPS.

    so, i told him how easy it was to get an FFL license… a few benny-folds and a little paperwork… GO NUTS! oh… one little stipulation… you surrender all personal freedom, and the ATF can raid any property you frequent without a warrant at any time without any notice.

    i was going to point out his recidivism regarding the misuse of deadly weapons (red convertibles)… but i was saving that for tomorrow.

    also, feeling out the suicide angle, but he seems the same. no enemies… just wants a gun. i’m still not sure. maybe guns should be BANNED.

    cal has never be wrong. he sucks so much.

  92. just hit a white d00d with the tele-robot. he listens to it all… then says… “uh….. ok.”

    i hear the realization in his voice regarding his life choices. i hope he buys a gun.

    #BOOM

  93. keep keeping your eyes on the pulse of scientificatorations, UNIVERSE)(*&#%)&(!#%

    now the government is holding a contest to see who can be the best at what i’ve been doing for years.

    these morons don’t understand that any such technological solution could be flipped and used against consumers to detect who is trying to fool them. just put a “NOT” to start the program and run it in reverse.

    i’ll keep fighting the fight. you keep being idiots.

  94. there is a disease that psychologically affects buying decisions before an eventual death caused by the disease. treatments exist that can extend life, but have very high costs.

    when the price of insurance is 1 unit, everyone who won’t ever be affected by the disease buys the insurance, but none of the people who will be affected buy it, and never will.
    when the price of insurance is 2 units, everyone who will be affected buys the insurance.

    an insurance company knows all of this. what price should they place on the insurance? are they legally obligated to make either choice? cal… sucks?

  95. so, after all of my recommendations, the brewnogdog decided on something completely different. pretty sure he’s just fucking with me. he hasn’t placed order yet, but the dealer offered a $30 lifetime guarantee, and a 1 time cleaning service over the first year. so fucking dumb. you have to clean your gun every time you use it. taking a gun in to get cleaned is like having someone else wipe your ass. a gun that would even come with a service plan is implying the gun could break… for something containing an explosion 2 feet from your head, you probably want to know first hand that it’s working right and was cleaned and reassembled correctly… BY YOU.

    i would be much more likely to give the guy $30 if they just asked… “how about you just give me $30 more?”

    INSURANCE IS FRAUD. ALWAYS.

  96. the same assholes that stand in the middle of the road and demand your attention and full submission got themselves a law… take their picture and go to prison for 10 years. don’t want your picture taken? GET OUT OF THE FUCKING ROAD, NAZI.

  97. new taco bell ad: “you don’t go to a sushi restaurant to get spaghetti”….

    their point, seemingly being, that you should then obviously go to a taco restaurant to buy scrambled eggs.

    #IDIOTS

  98. DUI becomes a felony in Wisco either: (1) on the fifth offense; or (2) on the fourth offense if the fourth offense occurs within five years of the previous offense. State and federal law prohibits felons from owning guns.

  99. after you’re a felon, you’re a felon for life? like the sex offender registry? 17 year old dates 15 year old, then hooks up on their 18th birthday and they can’t live near a school for the rest of their life?

    seems fair.

  100. our water heater stopped working. we had stipulation to get a brand new one when we bought the house over 3 years ago, so we got the top of the line… it came with 6 year warrantee… called the warrantee number and instead of coming out and fixing it, they made my wife write down all the instructions to fix what was likely the problem, and then she handed that off to me.

    1) FUCK INSURANCE / WARRANTEES / GUARANTEES
    2) i can fix water heaters now

    didn’t help any that the fuckers used security screws to seal it up… seemingly to specifically stop me from doing the thing they were asking me to do so they didn’t have to do their fucking job. thanks for that, JERKS)&*!#%)&*!#%&)*(!#%*()!%#

  101. also had a big ass velvety rack buck in the back yard. thought he would run away right when i opened the back door, but i just kept walking closer and closer until it seemed like he was about to walk up to me. he eventually just turned around and kept eating leaves while wiggling his tail feathers.

    at what point could i kill and eat him under some form of “stand your ground” law? he was eating my leaves. WHERE IS MY JUSTICE?#*)(%&^!#)(&^)(&!#^

  102. funniest part about those shady warrantee schmucks, they used “star of david” security screws.

    “standard or phillips?”

    “pass me the jew bit”

  103. I was in San Diego this month and saw many people wearing buttons mourning the loss of hometown hero Tony Gwynn. Back home, I really admired seeing one of our own Arizona Diamondbacks, Addison Reed, announcing he had quit chew after learning how it contributed to Gwynn’s death. Gywnn had been Reed’s coach at San Diego State.

    I hope this becomes a call to action for all baseball players, young and old.

    For Arizonans who want to follow in Reed’s footsteps, the Arizona Smokers’ Helpline is here to help.

    It helps to have a great coach to assist you in kicking a deadly addiction.

    Call 1-800-55-66-222 or visit ashline.org to get started.

    — Laurie Thomas,

  104. Felon status is for life. sex offender registry not necessarily. Some people are on that just for some period of time (10 years I think) others for life.

    Only way out of felon issue is to get a pardon from the governor. This governor has declared he isn’t giving any pardons.

    #THANKSOBAMA

  105. Only way out of felon issue is to get a pardon from the governor.”… what about revolution? is that no longer the duty of the oppressed? careful with those absolute adjectives, counselor.

    #BUYGUNS

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