We Built This City on Miso Soup

Number 1: I hate the web. I hate Internet Explorer. I hate JPG files. I worked on a post for about 20 minutes, and then I was looking at the pictures we took last night and it opened in the same window I was writing the post in. I hit the back button, post gone. I lost all of my literary genius to the fucking aether. So now I’m back… back again… Raj is back… with a pen. Raj is back, Raj is back, Raj is back. Doo doo doo doo-wee…

Whatever, now I’m going to make this short and sweet. One reason is because I’m pissed that I have to write it again, so all of the salacious wit I put into the first one is now just rage. Cal and the Cal Friends are making their way down to San Mateo today for a nice evening of vegetarian meals and wine. While waiting for them, I’ll give you the lowdown on what happened Friday and Saturday night.

Friday night was in San Jose. Your typical night, except that we went back to Waves expecting a packed asian throng and got… Creed, Jr. It was a fucking rock band, with a bunch of Number 1 Stunners hanging around. The term Number 1 Stunner was defined on Friday night. If you weren’t there, think rating girls on a scale of 1 to 10. Now think of what the lowest is. That, my friend, is a number 1 stunner. So we just got hammered. A bouncer came up to Madd and told him he better watch it tonight, because if he tries any shit he’ll get his ass kicked out of there. Madd was perplexed. He asked the bouncer what he did to piss him off. The bouncer says “You were up in here last Thursday pissing people off.” The bouncer walks away and Madd turns to us and says “I wasn’t here last Thursday.” Which is true. He wasn’t. So, Madd Scientist got busted for harassing ladies on a night he wasn’t there. Kinda reminds me of when Craig got fired on his day off for stealing boxes. What the hell was he trying to do anyways? Build a clubhouse?

As the night was winding down, near bartime we were stumbling around yelling things at people. We heard a loud skreeeeeee-krunk from up the block. We ran to investigate and found that a police car had t-boned an ambulance at an intersection. Both had been speeding down their respective sreets with their lights on, and hadn’t seen each other. I got an interview with a bystander, and Madd told a cop that he was in the back of the ambulance when it happened and that San Jose Police should stop driving after they were drunk. The cop was not happy. The audio will be up later for download, I’m too lazy to do it right now.

Last night we went to a bar in the city called Hi-Fi. It was some Judd-friends’ birthdays, and they had filled the bar with friends from the Bay down to LA. When we first got there it seemed like it was going to be really lame. Then, however, the birthday girl got up on the bar and started dancing with her two friends. After that, things started to get fun. They were spinning hip-hop all night (except at the end, when they were playing OLDIES~!), and near then end the DJ and some other guy who looked remarkably like the guy from The Neptunes started “freestyling”.

Yeah, that’s him alright. The one in the middle.

So the Neptunes guy comes down into the crowd and starts rapping from there. Judd is wholly unimpressed so he says some shit which the guy hears. The guy gets in Judd’s face and starts dissin him on the mic. They are having a staredown of epic proportions, and I really thought at one point that Judd was going to throw a punch.

Get ‘im, Judd. Punch him!

Overall, it was a pretty fun time. Before I forget, however, let me note on thing:

Nice stache, dawg. You should go on tour with the Neptunes.

Alright, so before I close this one down I just gotta say to click here to get selected pictures from San Francisco party. There’s some good ones there. Also, it was the first time we ever went out with Kendric, and he’s tight too.

8 thoughts on “We Built This City on Miso Soup

  1. Hi Zac,

    I think I broke your website. I tried to write a haiku and it came up as something completely different about absinth. Oh golly. But here is the real thing:

    Thank You Haiku

    Whazz Machine, I’m honored to
    Have dinner with you.

    I had so much fun with you guys last night. Hi to Erin.

  2. For months I’ve wondered why the productivity of my staff has gone down consistently and now it is clear. It’s all Moneypenny’s fault. You were once one of us and now you are the root of all our evil. I am new to whazzmaster so forgive me if the appeal is not clear to me yet. Note to all bellmen: if you are reading this at work you’re fired! Now go do something!

  3. Rockchalk, please stop bombarding me with your unhealthy and obsessive thoughts about “Roy” and your beloved Jayhawks. I don’t even like sports anyway, so your comments have no effect on me.

  4. just getting in a per-work whazz….

    lax will indeed be fun. my 2 stunnas up there are leaving saturday morning though, so it looks like we might go A game on friday. i’m going out with them after 10pm so my lady gets sufficient valentines lovin. i’ll still be good for saturday though. i’m a baller, we do what we do.

    casperson: bling bling watch set is a hook up. holla. also, i can get pendant chains at wholesale ($6)… how many dozen should i put you down for?

  5. [knock, knock
    who is it?]
    the midnite lyrical phantom
    where’s my chandelier?
    i’m gonna throw a tantrum
    i can’t hold on to my sanity
    damn bush and you whack MCs
    whazzmaster used to be cool (sorry zach)
    now its a grave yard for madd, and scott too
    Madd, you had to provoke me
    you never called me out
    but, its what you wrote Sceizz
    and Scott, bring the ruckus
    its fudd, now go on n suck this

  6. tightest in the beezy s feezy?
    naw naw, represented madd scieezy
    bout to blow point two oh
    got your ho yellin uh oh spaghetti-oh!
    my noodle go limp when i’m done
    9″ gun with another in my pocket
    like a rockem sockem robot with e in his locket
    judd, you need a pill… take 2
    cause you’ll wake up tomeezy and still be a jew
    hundred to one dropin hundreds like ones
    scieezy takin the trophy home
    and you’s like barkley: got none.
    time for bitches i’m out
    the kitchen still got grout
    time to pee… the scieezy madd. holla

Comments are closed.