Mountain Charlies=Insane

BLarg, I’m hungover this morning. Its 8:32 in the am and I’m sitting at my desk with a Jamba Juice trying to not dry heave. Mi estomago hurts, and there doesn’t seem to be much to do about it. Got home at about 1:30 last night, and had to wake up at 6:30 so Erin and me could carpool to work. Erin’s bridesmaid/childhood friend came for the weekend/bachelorette party and so we gave her Erin’s car for the day. Now, about last night…

Me, Erin, and Cathy (the aforementioned bridesmaid) met Madd Scientist, Scott, Judd, and Rachel (Madd’s lady) at Kendric’s soon-to-be ex-apartment for a pre-party before heading down to Los Gatos for some good old fashioned 12:30am-bar-time-excitement. One problem: Kendric’s entire house was in a box because he’s moving out this morning (Friday). The first problem begets a second problem: there wasn’t any liquor at this preparty. Aside: it was 95-100 degrees here yesterday, and it was a dry, horrible heat. Back to the story; we walk in and Judd and Madd have there pants arond their ankles and are sitting there drinking hard alcohol in there underwear. I made the introductions. Soon after I found out that there was no liquor. So we left for Los Gatos.

Let me tell you something about Los Gatos: it’s been described to me as the city that the Dot-Com Bust forgot. Everyone there is still blingin like there’s no tomorrow. You see Benzos, Hummers like whoa, etc. Also, the cast of characters is almost entirely caucasian, which is pretty fucking rare for the Bay Area. I was so used to being in a multicultural environment that it was kind of a shock to see a bunch of white girls.

There was a girl talking to Scott who was shaking her ass to the music. Madd walked up, tapped her on the shoulder, and said, “That’s real good. Now try it in time with the music.” Scott says (with hand motion), “ZING!”

The weird (and shitty) thing about the bar was that the bartenders were really bad and slow; the end result being that everyone who went to the bar would end up ordering about 50 drinks so they wouldn’t have to come back so soon. That led to one person’s order taking upwards of 5-7 minutes while the there is a crowd 3 deep all along the bar waiting for bartender access. Add to that the fact that most of the attendants were women who were ordering drinks that take a half hour to make, and you get a miserable drink-acquiring experience. In one trip I got 3 red bull & vodkas, 2 vodka and tonics, and 2 shots of “the railest vodka you got” for Scott and Madd. Scott did his like a trooper, but Madd spit his out OY-RAHEEB style. What, Scientist, is Tvarsky brand vodka shots not good enough for your refined Everclear tastes?

There was a fucking awesome space where the DJ played (back-to-back-to-back-to-etc.) Poison (Bel Biv Devoe), Ice Ice Baby, Bust-A-Move, and Baby Got Back. Then he flipped it into some Magic Stick and some Nuthin But A G Thang action. One thing I can say about Mountain Charlies Thursdays: good fucking music.

I got a little sick of Scott giving me wet willies and petting Erin’s head, so we busted out of there before bar time went home. I passed out upon arrival.

the end.

–whazz on

47 thoughts on “Mountain Charlies=Insane

  1. The other day I was wearing the blue fanny pack that you gave me for Christmas, remember CAL? Anyway, this big rusty ford pulled up beside me and started heckling me about being gay, and having a gay driver. He said that fanny packs are gay. I need to know, are you gay CAL, or is this supossed to me a man purse? R.S.V.P.

  2. I just got done checkingin a patient who is rather old and confused, while taking her blood pressure she rubbed my finger looking for a ring. I am not wearing any rings so she took one off of her old gnarled hands and tried puttingit on my finger, it was a very odd, but kind of funny experience.

  3. I wish I could have a dog that shakes hands like a man at my wedding. It would not go over well with anyoen else involved, however.

  4. Marksie – I think you should give your cats to S fifty or french connection. They seem to have problems getting pussy on their own. (did I just start a war?!)

  5. Erin has left the building, erin has left the building. I hope the girls have something interesting planned.

  6. dammit. gary shefield is 0 for 2 in the fifth inning… COME ON SHEFF! wirkus piked pods today… o for 2 also. go twins that is all.

  7. Wirkuswhazz how about fishing sometime. I have a little boa that we can use. Let me Know!

  8. zach, lets say the streak continues to the honeymoon… will you tell erin that you have man things to do and find an internet terminal somewhere, or just let the streak die?

  9. Wirkus is answering PBX right now because he is not loved anymore. Ha some Junior Bell Captain he is. Speaking of ha, remember the song Ha by Juvy?

  10. i heart you two jen- and mrs. moneypenny -but not mister moneypenny until tejada goes 0-4 today that is.

  11. yeah- what i think it does is refresh only once a week or less. crappy i know. you could teach them a thing or two about web site maintenance.

  12. Ok Jenny; I have you down for a 10:30 appointment on Saturday, July 12. Unfortunately, Lance is not gay. I am guessing pictures will start around 12:30 at the Lighthouse, but this will have to be later confirmed. Talk to you soon!!

  13. let me know, z-j-money-p… right now i’m debating driving home wed. night and coming back on saturday, only because i haven’t missed summerfest in like 40 years… i’d probably go thur. and fri, not sure who’s playing though (i think lewis black is on the comedy stage one day, but that’s probably come and gone)….. i just found a remix of genuwine’s “pony” w/ jodeci’s “i wanna freak you”…. my life is now complete

  14. thanks to wirkus’ explaination yesterday, i have joined your little “beat the streak” league, and am ready to do some damage… let the streaking begin!

  15. wirkus, fyi – the “…. bans guns on these premises” thing in minnesota is a leftover of the Gov. Ventura era (i think – i don’t really read the paper, so i may be making this up) anyway, one of the last things he did as governor was to pass a law that allows ANYONE to take a gun ANYWHERE in Minnesota…. the only way to override this law is to post a sign by EVERY entrance into your business, hence the signs all over the malls, etc….
    also, i may be dumb, but what’s BHDIES?

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