Congratulations Are In Order

Yet Another One Of Us has gradumated college. Congrats Grand Masta Caspa on clawing your way over the passed-out bodies of all those young lady club-goers, strippers, and all-around hoes that are attracted to you and grabbing that diploma with both hands.

Your final semester sounds a lot like mine: African Storyteller, Wanking 101, Communication 102, Clap for Credit. Its a time honored tradition to work hard until you’re one semester away from freedom, and then take a bunch of dumb freshman classes so you can go out to lunch at Wando’s with Casperson every day for lunch. Mmm, turkey dinner. Reward yourself with a turkey dinner at Wando’s today, GMC. It’s well-deserved.

Soon you’ll be moving out to California, where the “What Car Do You Drive?” mentality rules all.

Pros: warm weather the majority of the year, pretty good hip-hop radio stations, lots of money to be made

Cons: most people are so dumb that you want to cock punch them or so nerdy that you want to grind their face on a chain-link fence, traffic jams, It’s Not Madison

For the most part you’ve been here and seen it, but I caution you that it ain’t all Agenda dance clubs and Iguana’s burritos. It takes a strong will to see the shit you see and not want to start shooting everyone in sight. Keep it player, and rep Wisco til ya die.

Congrats again, dawg.

–whazz on

ps– If I find out you failed your finals I will summarily delete this blog post.

63 thoughts on “Congratulations Are In Order

  1. it sounds like GMC will put his jelly into anyone’s malebox whether they ask for it or not. no means no…so…NO, i do not want your jelly in my malebox, GMC. just keep makin deposits into wirkuswhazz’s malebox.

  2. 1. Zach – check your email.
    2. I just got back from a big gay lunch. I have quite a substantial bit of insider info on what is going on at the HoJo lately. To protect my sources, I cannot reveal my gossip online.
    3. The only winter hat I have right now is from some weird sports team with the initials SF (San Francisco?) in orange. I was putting my hat on as I left and Doug was like, since when are you a Giants fan? I love the gays.
    4. I ate so much that I am now adding “anorexia” as a gift I hope that Santa Claus gives me this year. But I’ve been so good…

  3. Milwaukee is a possibility…better job market.

    All you whazzers need to get in touch with me ASAP…Amy and I are finishing our wedding invitations and I need new phone numbers and addresses for nearly all of you.

    Whazz on.

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