See that thing on the back of your phone? It’s a camera!

So I’m sitting here thinking that the camera on my phone is fairly useless. I can take pictures but it’s tough as shit to show them to anybody. Not anymore, it ain’t:

So, now I can take pictures and immediately upload them here, from wherever I am at in the WORLD. The world’s a big place, doncha know. For example, tonight me and Tha Wife and GMX are taking in a comedy show at The Improv: Cedric the Entertainer. If we see him after the show maybe I can get my picture taken with him, you’ll all know about it before I can even get to the car.

So, from now on pictures go to Mobile Whazz while rants go here. It’s so fucking easy!

Paul’s Wedding is going to be a good-timey, old-fashioned, Wisconsinny BLAST. Yes. It will.

Go Brewers against the Spoes. I know you guys can pull a sweep off here. I KNOW IT. Lyle Overbay, I command you to go on a 57 game hitting streak and forever put the Brewers into the record books. FOREVER I SAY.

–whazz on

43 thoughts on “See that thing on the back of your phone? It’s a camera!

  1. Har har Scientist! I saw that a couple days ago. Now, I just know you’re not telling me to look at it because you agree with what he says, since you quote Chappelle Show all the fucking time.

    badoop badoop, bitch!

  2. Wow, its an interesting day in SJ, Erin just told me “Stop it, or I’m gonna make out with you” Wow.

  3. could somebody either confirm or disconfirm the following…manny ramirez ran around the outfield like that fucking monkey (not to be confused w/ porch monkey, this is just a random term) sammy sosa, but instead of a big flag, he used one the size of a cocktale umbrella in order to celebrate citizenship.

    i saw a clip of him on the newz, but not all.

  4. Tonight I take you out fournyaya: pods gets a hit 1st is all mine.

    Cla, you tell ginacarfora and the rest of your BTS cronies that there’s a new sheriff in town and his name is PAL. I’m thinking about going to the game tonight, but am not sure…

    whazz on

  5. Zach,

    Potawatomi’s poker room is dumb: small, crowded, and too $$. 50-100 holdem 20-40 holdem and one 2-4 table full of fucking retards.

    I did stay and play BJ for a bit. Won 80 bucks then dropped 20 in a slut on the way out. Up 60 on the day.

  6. This is my announcement that all photos posted on Moblog/buzznet are not licensed and therefore not to be posted without my written permission

  7. how do you like this play wirkus?

    Seat 4: TroyBateman ($2,009 in chips)
    Seat 5: HASHAY ($3,547 in chips)
    Seat 6: Grass-hopper ($3,553 in chips)
    Seat 8: edrugtrader ($3,034 in chips)
    Seat 10: slapthem ($2,857 in chips)

    ANTES/BLINDS
    edrugtrader posts blind ($50), slapthem posts blind ($100).

    PRE-FLOP
    TroyBateman calls $100, HASHAY folds, Grass-hopper calls $100, edrugtrader bets $783, slapthem calls $733, TroyBateman folds, Grass-hopper calls $733.

    FLOP [board cards JH,QH,9H ]
    edrugtrader bets $2,201 and is all-in, slapthem calls $2,024 and is all-in, Grass-hopper calls $2,201.

    TURN [board cards JH,QH,9H,10S ]

    RIVER [board cards JH,QH,9H,10S,6S ]

    SHOWDOWN
    edrugtrader shows [ QS,QC ]
    slapthem shows [ AS,8S ]
    Grass-hopper shows [ JD,QD ]
    edrugtrader wins $354, slapthem wins $8,671.

    SUMMARY
    Pot: $9,025 | Rake: $0
    TroyBateman loses $100
    HASHAY loses $0
    Grass-hopper loses $3,034
    edrugtrader bets $3,034, collects $354, net -$2,680
    slapthem bets $2,857, collects $8,671, net $5,814

  8. 2 hands later:

    Seat 4: TroyBateman ($1,734 in chips)
    Seat 5: HASHAY ($3,397 in chips)
    Seat 6: Grass-hopper ($165 in chips)
    Seat 8: edrugtrader ($1,083 in chips)
    Seat 10: slapthem ($8,621 in chips)

    ANTES/BLINDS
    HASHAY posts blind ($75), Grass-hopper posts blind ($150).

    PRE-FLOP
    edrugtrader bets $1,083 and is all-in, slapthem calls $1,083, TroyBateman folds, HASHAY calls $1,008, Grass-hopper calls $15 and is all-in.

    FLOP [board cards 6H,JS,5S ]
    HASHAY checks, slapthem checks.

    TURN [board cards 6H,JS,5S,3H ]
    HASHAY checks, slapthem checks.

    RIVER [board cards 6H,JS,5S,3H,4S ]
    HASHAY checks, slapthem checks.

    SHOWDOWN
    HASHAY shows [ 7D,7C ]
    Grass-hopper mucks cards [ 8S,4H ]
    edrugtrader mucks cards [ KD,KH ]
    slapthem mucks cards [ 10D,9D ]
    HASHAY wins $2,754, HASHAY wins $660.

    SUMMARY
    Pot: $3,414 | Rake: $0
    TroyBateman loses $0
    HASHAY bets $1,083, collects $3,414, net $2,331
    Grass-hopper loses $165
    edrugtrader loses $1,083
    slapthem loses $1,083

    fucking idiots. i’m out in 4th. low limit tourneys suck my ass.

  9. first hand mother fucker called 2,000+ chips to go all in with a gutshot STRAIGHT draw, when the board was all hearts and he didn’t have one. the other guy was drawing dead with 2 pair (barring no running jacks).

    the second one had a guy with 84o and 9To call me all in. wow. dumb. the 77 got me with a runner runner double gutshot straight.

    these idiots are why pokerroom is so easy to beat.

  10. you are correct. often the other players will say “so? he has your money now!” when i start to bitch. they don’t get it.

  11. ok. work with me on this one. there are about 3 topics involved.

    while drunk i decide to go to carls junior for some food. ryan is driving and uses his strategic communication skills to make me think it is a good idea to buy his food as well. we step in and want the same shit… a “six dollar burger” combo and the cheap chicken sandwich ($1.19 or $1.29). according to my credit statement, here is the charge:

    POS PURCHASE – 1051 E EL CAMINCARL’S JR SUNNYVALE CA 9702 $15.68

    We got home and discovered the chicken sandwiches were missing… this situation comes up a lot, and i have never gone back, because really, what can you do? again, ryan convinces me to go back. i go in and say we didn’t get the chicken sandwiches and she says that we didn’t order any… um… ok, here is my receipt… damn. all it says is the total which is more than 2 combos, so i did pay for them. in broken spanglish she says i have to pay if i want the chicken. i give her $3 and tell her to “keep el change-o”. i chuckle to myself and she doesn’t get the joke/insult/tip. whatever, so i got my chicken.

    here comes topic 2. the god damn “6 dollar burger” ad campaign. the burger only costs $3.95. the combo is $5.95. IT DOESN’T COST SIX DOLLARS! well the marketing people would say “well, scientist, it has the same value as a $6 burger you would get at, say chili’s… but we only charge $4! don’t you see the value?!”. no. no i don’t. but i do find it extremely stupid/ironic that i paid MORE than $6 for a god damn “six dollar burger” that the only reason they named it that is because it actually costs less than six fucking dollars! ARE YOU WITH ME HERE?! DO YOU SEE WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT!?

    1) fuck mexicans.
    2) fuck mexicans that work at carls junior.
    3) fuck mexicans that fuck up my order.
    4) fuck mexicans that can’t remember what happened 10 minutes ago (somewhat forgivable)
    5) fuck ad campaigns that are retarded

    6) fuck this list.
    7) fuck everyone/everything. and you.

    i hate you.

  12. Ok, first off I didn’t use any strategic communication skills to get you to buy my After drinking “snack”. THe conversation went something similar to this:

    Madd: I’m hungry (what a surprise).
    Zach: Me too.
    Ryan: I concur.
    M: Let’s go to the Italian place that we went to that time we were fucked up.
    Z: (blank stare)
    R: Oh you mean the place on Steven’s Creek, ok.
    Time lapse of a couple minutes.
    R: Dude, its after 11, they are not going to be open.
    M: Are you sure? I think they are.
    R: Yes I’m sure. How about KFC, we’re right here.
    Z: Yes.
    M: Hell yes! (Grabs debit card and throws it to R in drivers seat). I’m buying.
    Z&R (To selves): yes
    KFC MAN: Sorry were closed.
    All: Are you fucking serious?!?!?!
    R: How about Carl’s Jr?
    Z (hesitant): uuummmm, not really in the mood for that. How about Taco Bell?
    M: I’ll do Carl’s Jr.
    R: I’ll take Z to taco bell, and swing around and we can grab Carl’s Jr.
    R throws Debit card back to M. We then proceed to Taco Bell, grab Z’s food and swing around to Carl Jr’s. M and R proceed inside. R orders, M orders and throws Debit card to cashier. End of R’s portion of story.

  13. i think the next poll should be…what do u think about when you see a ‘lose 20 pounds in 3 weeks without working out ‘commercial on the tv?

    a. i wonder if that would work for me
    b. i wonder if i have a weight disorder
    c. i wonder if the madd scientist wants some
    d. i bet that shit just gives u the runs & u lose water weight only

  14. 1 Ticket to the weekly GP (Worth $110.00) +$348
    2 Ticket to the weekly GP (Worth $110.00) +$232
    3 Ticket to the weekly GP (Worth $110.00) +$139
    4 Ticket to the weekly GP (Worth $110.00) +$93
    5 edrugtrader Ticket to the weekly GP (Worth $110.00) +$81
    6 billytransit Ticket to the weekly GP (Worth $110.00) +$58
    7 The Drake $93
    8 draftman $70
    9 rabiddave $46

    boom. that was the midnight oil with 91 entrants. i really fucked up. i was 3rd in chips (pretty much tied for 2nd) and 4th and 5th had a third as much as us and were tied. i went all in against the chip leader with an overpair and lost to get 5th. that was dumb considering how much the prizes jump.

    i also got 27th in the guaranteed tourney out of 419. i was chip leader in that one until the end when i blew up 3 times in 10 hands and lost. only top 20 paid there.

    watch me in the GP this weekend though… both times i’ve finished on the bubble so far, and that money is HUGE. like $8k for first.

    i think i have a 50/50 chance this sunday to get in th money. holla.

  15. wirkus, i’ve never paid so close attention to the brewers until u went on your little bts run. well, its unfortunate that you tied, but i’m happy since u didn’t beat me. hats off my friend.

  16. 1. In spite of myself, I liked the carl’s jr. story. Very slice of life. I especially like the throwing of the atm card.

    2. Dude, wirkus, I TOLD YOU SO! Not exactly a no hitter but he was pretty solid through five innings.

    3. I am going to win the CAL BEAT THE STREAK CHALLENGE.

    whazon!

  17. uh, the description of this thread is broken!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh comments only! Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

  18. 1 pokerman1960 La Plata 15,296
    2 edrugtrader Ft Wayne 10,725
    3 Luxx Burbank 9,507
    4 Cody1978 Murrieta 9,236
    5 tsnsbr Culver City 8,932

    301 entrants, 120 left. i’m about to ball on these negroes.

  19. 1 edrugtrader Brentwood 40,416
    2 pokerman1960 Brentwood 37,368
    3 bigbryguy69 Truckee 32,503

    30 left. man i’m good at this

  20. Hi Scott! What do you mean Judd turne gay on Sunday? Sweet little Heather (that is when you don’t cuss), would you like to come over on Sunday to watch the pay per view with us? It would be a blast, and we could drink carbful beers.

  21. 1 A-RECRUITER Visalia 41,438
    2 thinktwice1 Del Mar 36,531
    3 arvoarvo Inglewood 32,187
    4 mamalove111 Anaheim 29,602
    5 chich12 Anaheim 27,659
    6 edrugtrader Pleasanton 23,375

    53 out of 413 left in the guaranteed… doing both at once. ZING.

  22. you’ll have to ask that fag how he turned gay, but i have it on good word from a close source that he is. since i’m not gay, he didn’t even wanna socialize with me tonite over pitchers of beer.

    who’s watching the ppv this weekend? isn’t gmx out of town. i know i’m goin to sedona & judd is gonna gay it up in fenix (not to call fenix gay, but rather just judd).

  23. damn it.

    1 $2,500
    2 $1,500
    3 chich12 $1,000
    4 kadfool $800
    5 thecap $500
    6 rabiddave $400
    7 A-RECRUITER $300
    8 jjiimm $200
    9 Mr.Cash2003 $175
    10 lovelykoala $125
    11 deeznuts4 $100
    12 Jiffy Feet $100
    13 johnnypoker1 $100
    14 Bonzium $100
    15 soggy jay $100
    16 mamalove111 $100
    17 arvoarvo $100
    18 edrugtrader $100

    only got 18th out of 413.

    last hand, i have AcKc and 25,000. blinds are 1500, 3000. i open the pot 3 off the button for 10,000. button goes all in for 15,000 more. i call. he has AhQd. i am a 97% favorite. of course the board ends up KdAd2d7d6c. oh well. i was in like 10th place of chips at the time and 10th got the same as 18th, so i wanted to get all in anyways to make a move… had i won the pot i would have won this thing. oh well.

    good night of poker. i highly recommend sklansky’s tournament book and brunson’s no limit tournament section of his ‘super system’ book. both are helping me along.

  24. Cool.

    My limit is now solid… I always win a bit, but no-limit is not. I win more than I lose in single tables, but multi I can only get top 20%. Shit like I got pocket jacks, bet, get two callers. Flop is babies, rainbow. Dude bets, other dude calls, I move all in, one guy has pocket kings. I’m a ghost.

    I’ll check out the books.

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