Where Are They Now?

Via Luke in comments, an extremely interesting Letter to the Editor from the Journal Times:

I see myself as Bush’s employer so I must determine if I want him to continue his employment. How will I do this? I will look at his accomplishments, like any employer would do. Here are his (Bush) accomplishments: More than two million Americans have lost their jobs since he took office.

He set the record for least number of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.

He spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupt the U.S. Treasury.

He is the all-time U.S. and world record holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations.

He misled the nation in the State of Union address about the reasons for attacking Iraq. He invaded and occupied two countries at a cost of $1 billion per week.

He set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.

He failed to fulfill his pledge to capture Osama bin Laden.

He is the first U.S. president in history to withdraw the United States from the United Nations Human Rights Commission and from the International Criminal Court.

The war and civilian causalities, and the endless war are not impressive.

Who hired this guy? His accomplishments as the governor of Texas are no better. What about his education and experience? This is no better! How did he become president of the United States? Oh! It was the 2000 election in Florida! His resume is not impressive. His job performance is appalling. I’ll let him stay until Nov. 2 then I will have to fire him.

Rod Kennedy

Who is this man? Why, none other than our eccentric assistant head tennis coach from high school. One time I broke my toe in an auto accident (The Marriott Drive Into The Ravine) on Friday night. I called Coach Kennedy at 6am Saturday morning and told him that I would not be able to make the meet later in the day. On Monday I was dropped down the rankings and disciplined because I “no-showed” the meet. I guess he thought me calling him up and explaining my injury was a dream or something. And that’s the guy that wrote this letter.

The End

9 thoughts on “Where Are They Now?

  1. i still remember the time you no showed for work because you got drunk and slammed your pecker in the microwave door while trying to make taquitos. if I recall correctly, Tom Z wrote you up and down for that shit and made you show your bruised member to Linda Bartlet to prove you werent making it all up.

  2. made you show your bruised member to Linda Bartlet to prove you werent making it all up

    Nah, it was Mark Brown and Dan Lawrence.

  3. I also remember Adam Kivisto (?) chasing me around the courts trying to throw balls at me, and Rod just standing there with no idea what was going on.

  4. 1. As I posted in the previous post, I became Jen when I went to live in Paris with the gays and they renamed me.

    2. Last night was my birthday: big mistake. I started drinking at 2:30 p.m. and didn’t stop for about another 12 hours…ON A SCHOOL NIGHT. Justin and I went to dinner at this surreal mexican restaurant in the valley with an even more surreal Mariachi band, and then met Doug and Franz for one drink, which actually ended up being a dance club, 20 more drinks than planned, a jealousy freakout (courtesy of Justin), witness to a hit-and-run, and an afterbar with this random gay man that Doug knows who took us to his mom’s house and had a nervous breakdown in the kitchen, who also lives across the street from, none other than: T.J. Ford.

    Needless to say I needed a day off of classes today. Mia wrote and said: welcome to your late 20s.

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