Day 14: First Draft of Demand of Payment Letter

Hello everyone. Here’s an update on the Fight Against Evil. I’m awaiting a mail from Sandy Adams & Associates (the property management company) that includes all of the orginal receipts for the repair work and cleaning. In the meantime, I’ve made a first draft of the letter that I must send in order to have a right to sue Steve in small claims court. If I don’t send a letter demanding payemtn, my suit can be thrown out. So here goes, let’s see if Steve responds to my threat to play hard ball.

December 23, 2004

Steve Misrack
11 Pinewood Ct.
San Mateo, CA 94403

RE: Disbursement of 1371 Norman Dr. Security Deposit

After going over the various receipts and estimates you have sent us, and after speaking with Step Ahead Carpet & Flooring and Sandy Adams, I have determined that what you have charged us upon moving out of 1371 Norman Dr. is unreasonable and unfair.

Starting with $810 in cleaning costs, moving through $500 in repair and labor, and ending with a preposterous demand for $1650 for a scratched floor, it appears that you wish to extract as much money as possible from us. I spoke with Sandy Adams and she told me that when you walked the property after she did you added a number of items to be fixed to the list that she apparently thought were not significant enough to warrant note on the move-out checklist.

We are being charged for such minutiae as fixing a mirror with a crack on the side, paying someone to sweep the side entry (which is the upstairs tenant’s responsibility per the lease), and replacing exterior and interior light bulbs.

In addition, you did not, as you led us to believe, have Step Ahead Carpet and Flooring inspect the damaged floor and make an estimate. Instead, you yourself determined that the floor could not be repaired. You yourself took a ridiculous area of 330 sq ft to the flooring company and asked for an estimate based on that. No one from the flooring company ever saw the size of the damaged area, or determined through inspection that it could not be repaired. I know this because I spoke with the gentleman that wrote out the estimate you provided. Indeed, thank you for including the (unasked for) photos of the floor in question. They prove that the damage itself was limited to quite a small area no bigger than 6’x6’.

I have included a separate list of items that I feel go above and beyond what is a fair compensation for the cleaning work and repairs that were required upon moving out. Subtracting those items from the total bill of $3,237.81 leaves you owing me $—.– (fill this amount in once I have all receipts from Sandy Adams). I expect a check from you as soon as possible. If you do not comply with the above request, I will be taking all of my documentation, along with witnesses, photographs, receipts, your “estimate” for the floor, and full knowledge of my rights under California Law to the Palo Alto Small Claims Court.

Good day,

Zachery Moneypenny

Suggestions on revisions for tone and rationalness are requested. I want to ensure that some of my outrage comes through, but I don’t want to harm my case by making completely outrageous statements. Please comment with any suggestions.

–fuck everything, we’re going to five blades

7 thoughts on “Day 14: First Draft of Demand of Payment Letter

  1. 1. The next time I write an exam, I’m going to close with: “Fuck everything, we’re going to five blades.”
    2. Nice tone, Moneypenny: very condescending. Maybe you, too, should go to law school. Defend the little guy one consumer law cae at a time.

  2. Note to all that if the The Onion hadn’t closed shop on all their archives, I would have the linked the Fuck Everything to the story itself. Sorry, The Onion.

  3. Fine letter. Good day was a dandy of an ending. I picture a young crippled mailman limping up to the door of his mansion, Steve, alone, dining on a fine roast, getting up from the table, picking at his teeth with a shard of bone as he walks to the door. Then???? I’d pay good money (25$) to have seen Old Man Misrack’s face upon reading the letter. I also enjoyed pop torts. Ha! That Cal…

    Alright then: merry xmas, whazz on.

  4. Merry Christmas, everyone. I am at work at the Connie, & super bored, so I thought I would see what’s going on here. First of all, Congrats Wirkus & Bellgirl. I suggest you name your kids (well, last names at least) Wirkus-Bellgirl, complete with hyphen. Today was a very slow day at the Connie-the most exciting thing that happened was a woman with 1/2 blond, 1/2 orange hair came in to make change for $100. She pulled the bill from between her breasts. The bill smelled like “Victoria’s Secret Rapture” (the VS perfume that was popular in the 80’s). I also lost at Scrabble-Ewaz won. Twas a sad day, indeed. Happy Holidays.

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