Ashlee Simpson, Stupid Whore

Via Salon.com‘s The Fix (subscription needed), I see that that paragon of Artistical Integrity, Ashlee Fucking Simpson, now has a prepared response to Orange Bowl’s fans’ rather unexcited response to her performance on Tuesday evening: they’re retarded.

Booers, hissed: Are all those people who booed Ashlee Simpson Tuesday night after her performance during the Orange Bowl’s halftime show just jealous or, like, dumb? People who gripe about her music and her performances “are just old people who watch the news and don’t know anything about me,” Simpson tells Teen People in the magazine’s upcoming issue. And it’s not just old people and college football fans who have it out for her, in her view. “Hollywood people are so retarded! They’re ridiculous! ” she recently commented after the Teen Choice Awards. “Girls get jealous. And they’re mean.” (Teen People via N.Y. Daily News, Edmonton Sun)

Yeah, girls are jealous of your fake goth hair and nonexistant singing talents. Will this idiot please OD on something so we can be rid of her? Well, I’m not that old and I hate her. Maybe it’s because I hate spoiled, no-talent siblings of other dumb whores who are famous because they’ve got big tits and have some talent. Someone needs to hit that bitch in the face with a large, freshwater fish. And if there’s still some scales and one bulging eye leftover, smack her fucking sister once for good measure.

–whazz on

19 thoughts on “Ashlee Simpson, Stupid Whore

  1. Yo, Z to the Ach, have you seen the Sin City movie trailer? Haven’t read the books, but supposedly the movie is extremely faithful to the source since Frank Miller wouldn’t let anyone touch the title until Robert Rodriguez (i think?) showed off what he could do.

  2. I can’t say I own *any* music by these people, but I must say the one or two times I heard Ashlee Simpson’s music I actually didn’t think it was too bad. I liked it a lot more than any of the other teen/twentysomething queens.

    That’s not to say the above comments aren’t pretty stupid, though. Although her sister bothers me a lot more.

  3. Haven’t seen anything with Sin City either the books or movie.
    My latest picukups were Hellboy, Lucifer and Strangers in Paradise. Probably will be getting more of those with the plethora of gift cards we received for Xmas.Check out sequentialswap.com sometime if you have spare trades lying around.

  4. All you tech-minded whazzers – what is your recommendation for a good linux starter. The reason I am asking is I am sick of Windows (two reasons – I can’t find the academic volume license key to reinstall the windows xp pro that I purchased legally from UW, and I don’t want to buy a full priced version), I need something that I can learn on (believe it or not, my unix and linux skills have gotten rusty since my last compsci class), and, more importantly, I need something my wife will not flip out over. So I was thinking debian and kde, but I would appreciate your input as well.

  5. Oh dear lord. Paul, I’ll be straight with you here: I hate Linux. I know I used to like it and all but I hate it now. DLL Hell? I’d gladly prefer that to a system like the following:

    install AppA;
    ***error: you are missing required modules Mod B, App C, and Lib 4Q
    install Mod B;
    ***error: you are missing Lib Z
    install Lib Z;
    ***syntax error in line 342: ON_TOP unknown identifier
    install FUCK YOU LINUX;
    ***error: syntax error in XFree86.conf, line 67: LINUX cannot FUCK YOU

    and so on and so forth. I’ve started to appreciate .Net more and more, and now I just appreciate that for the 95% of things I want to do, Windows works. The other 5% is why I have my Mac iBook.

  6. Zach and Paul – Debian is *beautiful* when it comes to dependency hell. dselect isn’t the most pretty program, but it’s your friend when it comes to installing/removing software.

    FYI, there are 3 branches – stable, testing, and unstable. Stable is just that, although some software is a bit old – KDE is still at 2.x I believe. I had some bad luck with testing once, but I haven’t tried it since, and I’ve never tried unstable (newest stuff). I have heard that unstable is sometimes more stable than testing, though. FWIW, you *can* get backports of some newer software (Firefox, etc) for stable, just not from the Debian tree directly.

    I have run into a few problems getting X working, even under stable, but other than that things have been pretty smooth.

  7. Try Knoppix and see if you and Amy like it. It burns onto a CD and you can run it from there. If you both hate it, no big deal. If you want to switch, go ahead and install it. Its probably the least risk solution to start with.Zach, have you done any .NET interop to old COM components? I’m working on that now for a small project and I have to say, it may “work” easily, but the path to get there is hell.

  8. RE: .Net interop

    Since QuickBooks is made of some 12+ yr old legacy code, it’s gonna get dicey when we start to use .Net witht he existing code base. I’m not looking forward to that as of now.

    Also, Dictionary.com says:

    Artistic \Ar*tis”tic\, Artistical \Ar*tis”tic*al\, a. [Cf. F. artistique, fr. artiste.] Of or pertaining to art or to artists; made in the manner of an artist; conformable to art; characterized by art; showing taste or skill. — Ar*tis\”tic*al*ly, adv.

  9. For all the corporate Whazzers out there, a helpful tip: NEVER SIT NEXT TO A PERSON DOING VIBRATION TESTING!This concludes our public service announcement.

  10. There is a video you can download on foxnews.com that someone took while the wave came in. You can see about 50 people on the beach and then all of a sudden they’re gone. About 10 seconds later, you can see some bodies way out in the water. Amazing and very sad at the same time.

    Zach, thanks for the vocabulary lesson.

  11. I am extremly f*cked up thanks to everyone coming and leaving our house and also cause of the packers sucking

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