I was going to write a long post about Erin and I went hiking in Big Basin last Saturday and the great time we had playing with Giant Salamanders and such, but time is a void and all that nonsense so I decided to instead post about something we’ve been doing the past few nights before bed.

The gist of the entertainment is this: I read Erin excerpts from Wrestlecrap, written by the people who run the inestimable website of the same name.

We guffaw loudly to such classic editorializing as (paraphrased) “Bischoff kept asking Hogan who he saw in the mirror? What was happening? Idiot.” There is also much to laugh about when reading about Hogan’s movie career (such as it was,) consisting of movies such as No Holds Barred, Suburban Commando, Mr. Nanny, and Santa with Muscles. Don’t ask about Thunder in Paradise.

More fun was had when I acted out the hilarious skits done in WCW to promote PPVs. Example Number One: Spin the Wheel, Make The Deal, which climatically ends with laser beams coming out of Sting’s and Jake “The Snake” Robert’s eyes and the entire room exploding. Also: Cheatum the evil one-eyed midget.

Here’s a tip for couples everywhere: the healing power of laughter goes far to establishing a basis for a relationship; therefore it’s in your best interest to read commentary critical of badly-produced Pay-Per-View-hocking minimovies of the mid- to late-80s to each other before retiring to bed each night.

Good night, whazzmaster.com.


20 thoughts on “Hilarity

  1. 1. Big Show and Mrs. Big Show: welcome to Milwaukee! If I were you, I would live around Marquette or on the South Side, but I’m really poor and partial to neighborhoods with a supersized El Rey grocery store attached to a Taco Loco, so maybe you shouldn’t take my advice.

    2. Speaking of El Rey, now whenever I leave my place I demand to be driven by the Milwaukee County “Criminal Justice” Facility (the big jail where they put all the black people) so I can get excited about working on Monday. I’m also putting together my public defender soundtrack which will include tunes from Ani DiFranco (‘Tis of Thee) and Akon (you know the one). I bought a Santa Muerte candle at the Mexican grocery store, too: she’s the patron saint of criminals and poor people. How very appropriate.

  2. CDL, I recognize you and your whazz accomplishments! Were it not for you, I wouldn’t have a $2000 gigantic piece of junko sitting in my garage. Also, if not for you, Zack Hedling’s life would not forever be defined by “video golf.”Big J: how nice, do you think the hardened criminals of Milwaukee will be inspired that, while you’re working to spring them, instead of listening to the theme from Rocky you are swooning to the crooning of Ani DiFranco and/or Tori Amos?I may just trademark the term “Swooning to the Crooning;” it could come in useful for an album title down the line.I believe Point 3 is fully compliant with the MLA Handbook.

  3. Whoah! Are those things considered “mutton-chops?”

    Big J- What about, “I Fought The Law (and the Law Won)” by Bobby Fuller?

  4. I must say that when I saw that PPV at Wirksu’s house in Milwaukee, I was inspired to be more like The Rock of 1998. Hence, the burns. I must say, I have received many a compliment from everyone I meet while the wife if NOT a fan. She’ll get used to ’em too, jabroni.

  5. Whoa. I thought that pic was an old one you dug up from somewhere. Hmmmmm… I like em, but I think they need a little more form, more of a sickle-shape than the spear-shape you got going on right now.

  6. turn the spear shape into a full fledged arror (the spears cousin).’

    the it would point at your junk… milk it for humor.

  7. The computer at the Moneypenny household broke down this weekend. (I think it was from overuse.) Whatever the reason, this weekend was awesome. We did errands and watched movies and talked… I hope the computer is broken forever. That is all.

  8. My windows installation is corrupted, but I can fix it by Repairing with a Windows XP (which I don’t have). All may not be lost… or Erin can approve (as iProcurement manager) the purchase of a new tablet laptop (see next thread). Her choice, but there will be a computer in our house.

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