Donkey Konga 2

Early returns on Donkey Konga 2 indicate a solid Meh Rating. They strayed from the formula that ensured that I liked the first one. Before I give my impressions, I’ll quote one of The Masters:

I’ll tell you that I’m tired of hearing every person who reviews the fucking game tell me what kinds of music they don’t like. I don’t give a flying fuck what kind of music you listen to. What I want to know is if these new songs provide interesting, original rhythms I can play solo or with my friends when they come over. Will it extend the amusement I get from the peripherals I purchased? I don’t want to know what’s on your fucking iPod, and I don’t care if this music does not create in you a state of elevated consciousness. I’ve played through every song, and half again on the punishing difficult mode, and I vouch for the gameplay provided in this expansion. The tunes provided by Donkey Konga 2 include many popular “radio” songs which supposedly amount to a kind of despicable mainstream outreach program – as opposed to that solid gold line-up in the first Donkey Konga. I suppose these new “tracks” simply lack the ironic kick of the first game’s “Bingo Was His Name-O” or the haunting, recursive nautical shanty “Row, Row, Row Your Boat.”

It’s not that I hate pop music and am therefore deeply offended at the temerity of Nintendo to include some music fresh off Z104. It’s more along the lines that a lot of the music just isn’t great to bongo to. Example: whoever had the idea to include TLC’s seminal work on ugly chicks: Unpretty, should be taken out and beaten with a copy of the first game until he learns that fun songs make a fun game. Donkey Konga is about getting drunko and banging on bongos with your friends; I didn’t buy the game to hear TLC’s treatise on the the plight of low women’s self-esteem in our country. Donkey Konga 1 implored me to Dance in the Street, or possibly even Oye Coma Va if indeed that translates to a verb. I suspect that by the time Donkey Konga 3 comes out we’ll be bongoing to Jason Song’s dissertation on economics.

I haven’t unlocked most of the Gorilla mode songs yet, so maybe some of the wankerish selections are all-of-a-sudden going to be awesome in Tough Mode, but without the ability to bop my head to the music I’m a bit pessimistic. I’ll check back in once Erin and I have digested the game a bit further.

RAJ OUT.

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