Wirkstew Really Wants You To See This

To review how we got here, I’ll turn the mic over to wirkstew himself:

St. Loiuis was cool. Kinda beat up, but nice. Saw two games (Monday we got destroyed; Tuesday we won), but sadly no Whitey Herzog Bobble heads: they were all gone when we got there. Dang. It woulda went well with my Pittsburg Pirate patriotic July 4th ball cap I got last year. The stadium was nice and junky, kinda like County Stadium, and their new stadium looms behind half-built like the death star. Beers are really big (20oz of Bud Light) and the hot dogs are really red and tasty. Overall the fans were nice.
OUr hotel was cool. They converted a train station into a hotel and mall. It had some cool foutains and a pond full of goldfish that you could feed pellets to for .25 cents. There were also a few turtles. I spent .75 total on this. We also did some tourist shit, hit the arch (stupid) and a riverboat casino ( par for us: I won 50, Jessie lost 70). We ate some good meals (ribs, seafood, sushi) and got drunk (bar time 3am, across the river in Illionois 5am). All in all a good time.

Oh yeah: we also snapped a pic of the best lady in STL: 55 yrs old, white spandex short shorts, cards jersy tucked in to the shorts, cigar in mouth, cowboy hat on top. Yeee HAAAWWWWW. I’ll send the pic to z-money to post. Whazz on.

Without further ado: look upon St. Louis’ works, ye mighty, and despair!

55 yrs old, white spandex short shorts, cards jersy tucked in to the shorts, cigar in mouth, cowboy hat on top.

RAJ OUT.

33 thoughts on “Wirkstew Really Wants You To See This

  1. Way to go getting Jessie to pose as if you weren’t taking that crazy’s picture for posterity.

  2. So far everyone I’ve shown the picture to thinks it is a man but I swear on that lot little shite ass that it was a woman baby!!

  3. It is tigh package. Very tight. Any you know something? I think this woman would make an excellent wife for CAL. They both love a good stogie and I think they’d have a great time exploring each others tight little runner’s body.

  4. I meant hot little white ass, sorry. Also I do think it is impressive when people are skinny enough to tuck in things like jerseys and sweaters.

  5. Mike- my mom is putting that picture on refrigerator as a goal for our wedding. She hopes to look as skinny and as hot as that lady, what do you think??

  6. You can’t tell me what to do, aren’t you supposed to be doing the wash and scrubbing the floors before I come home?????

  7. At first I was convinced it was a lady. Now I’m not so sure… I wish you guys would have gotten a frontal shot; those pants are so tight that we’d know instantly.

  8. Hey, you know in Good Will Hunting when homegirl (Minnie Driver) tells that blowjob joke at the bar? Well, I think that: A) it’s a funny joke B) a well done scene– I liked her and I liked dude and I really wanted her joke to be funny, for her sake.

    But anyway, the TV version has a different joke… a clean joke. Kinda interesting. It kills the scene though because the joke isn’t as funny, and then when they film the dude’s reaction to the joke it’s kinda off because they are laughing as if they heard a good joke.

  9. agreed 10000%. i watch GWH every time it’s on TV for some reason. that scene always pisses me off because it doesn’t fit right.

  10. oh man. i just popped open whazzmaster and bellgirl stared back at me and i thought, “silly bellgirl… there is a crazy behind you, and you know it”… but then i thought to myself “i like that shirt but something is curious about the neckline…” then i figured it out.

    o

    o

    o

    o ooo

    o

    if you invert the picture, the shawdowing, the collar bone and cleavage makes her chest look like the head of a penis. yipes. if you include the next then it’s like a skinny tiny dick. probably like cal’s dick. i found cal’s dick like people find waldo.

  11. i am 2nd in chips with 27 people left in a $20 multi. please wait for post about how i lose.

  12. i got 6th for $100. fucking joke. AKs vs A6o. i had been going all in 6 hands in a row so it was a perfect trap. blinds were 500-1000 so EVERYONE was short stack and equal with everyone else. flop gives me flush draw too, so he has to catch one of 2 off suit 6s… dude gets a 6 on the river for 30k pot where we all had 12-17k. i was big stack and he was smallest. then i had 5k. triple up next hand to 15k. KJs and flop J. a few people go out, i have BB for 1200 and dumb dude i have been pushing around all day makes it 2400… he always folded to a re-raise. i have AJs and push in and he calls with 99. flop KsTs2c… any A, J, Q or spade. turn Tc. any A, J, Q, K or spade… jesus, i think that is 2 million outs. damn 7 on the river and i take the junko prize. first was $500. fuckers.

  13. also in my perfect world, you are not allowed to procreate with anyone in your direct “race tree”… and none of your siblings could procreate with anyone in the direct “race tree” of anyone you procreate with. genetic differences between the races have already been isolated. eventually this will stop fueding, remove all borders and make all humans work together on a system to move people around the world and have a communications network available to everyone. sadly, that future is the best future posible for EVERYONE, but is the worst future posible for people that value the ability to TRY and have a better life than the one handed to them on a golden platter. do you have any idea the combined value of the american work force? everyone wants the dream house with jaccuzzis and shit, but if everyone worked to give everyone else exactlly that, then everyone would have AT LEAST that much, and just be required to help other people have the same 8 hours a day. everyone would be super rich. instead, everyone works 8 hours a day for the man while 95% of the wealth is held by the top 5% of the population… yeah, that makes sense. so dumb.

  14. I can’t tell if Scientist got up early or stayed up late. Tremendous spying of a donger, though, Madd.

  15. He didn’t got to bed. You know that. Also, kinda funny: since they cxled our Giambi/pujos trade Giambi has 11 dingers and Pujos has 6. HA ha ha. I’m on a tear. This morning I cut Burnitz. Fuck em. I told him if he got too fat I’d chop him. He got to fat…

  16. Ok, here is a story about my yesterday.

    Yesterday by Mike Wirkstew

    Woke up around 11:00. Went to the store bought a paper, a blueberry muffin, and 15$ worth of quarters.

    Drank coffee, ate muffin, read paper, moved a bowel and then opened the Chinese laundry and washed and folded like a mother fucker for 5 loads straight. Played a little poker in between and went on a short jog.

    4:30 showered, got ready for dinner. A cool steak place called Coepers invited all the bellmen in the city. Before dinner, took the dog out. During the quick walk met a nut who needed her dead car pushed. It was raining, I had a dog on a leash and slick bottomed dress shoes on. Some lady walked by and she held my dog and I pushed. I got dirty, but got the job done.

    5:15 Took a cab to Coeper’s. Cab drivers were dirty Africans. Like, for real filthy. Had two drivers for some
    reason. When I got to dinner, no one from my group was there. Odd. I sat at the bar, got a drink (free) and some apps (ribs, stuffed mushroom caps, free) and talked with the owner. I had 3 scotch and sodas and a beer before the host realized the mistake. They had so many people sign up for the free grub that they had to split it into two groups. My group was set for 7:30. No one called me, and all I had was the original invite. whoooops? No: whoop there it is. Dude sat me with the Phister valets and we all became fast friends. Ben Sheets, like, takes these dudes out for dinner and shit. I very well may have fucked up not taking that job when I had the chance, For dinner I enjoyed a filet, 3 shrimp and baker, salad, bread. I skipped desert and had 3 more scotch and sodas and enjoyed one last beer with my real group at 7:30. Dropped 20$ for a tip and moved on.

    So far, between laundry, cabs, tips, coffee, paper, I’d spent 47$. I went out called a cab and had him whazz me to the casino, pushing the total to 55$.

    I went up to play poker: long ass line, said pffffttt! to that and saddled up to a black jack table. Played a few shoes, went up 160$. Bet 50$ and 3 whites for the dealer on my last hand, lost, moved on with 110$.

    Got a call from “Tha Rake.” She was coming home from Hortonville. Told her to hit the valet and meet me in the sports bar for the rest of the Brewer’s game. Bought her some quesadillas and some booze, bought myself a beer, watched the crew take down Arizona. Lyle Overbay hit a dinger, more points for me. On the way out let her play a slot, she won a tiny bit. After paying for dinner and tipping the valet, I had 20$ more dollars in my pocket than when I woke up. Perfect-o.

  17. The above is sorta like an Ice Cube “good day” though substitutions for things I like over things he likes.

  18. i won $200 in 2 hours, then played later and broke even over 4 hours including the tourney win. all said money goes to the official wedding fund. no fun will be had with it at all. no steak. no paper. no coffee.

  19. $10 says this chick ordered word for word “eh, give me a popcorn and a liter-a-cola”.

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