Franksville Living

I’m going to start a new magazine called Franksville Living. It will showcase the innate fashion and style of my parent’s new hometown outside of Racine. The first issue will have an ex-pose-zay on the new Walgreen’s going up in the center of town, with interviews of the local diner and auto-service shop patrons. Next issue I’m looking towards doing a photolayout on the local liquor store. Not only are they lovable, but they’re lovably gruff. Look for it on newstands soon.

24 thoughts on “Franksville Living

  1. jen, what do you mean by we are all better off by killing a poor person? i theorize about macro economics almost constantly as it directly relates to poker, but sadly i could care less what the great minds of the past have to say about it (i haven’t read any books on the topic). all of my models have the economy resting squarely on the shoulders of the poor. remove the poor and the rich begin to crumble and we all move towards middle ground. so if that result is your definition of better off for everyone, then i agree, but from that point it is only natural to move back towards the extremes, so it is only a temporary oasis. give a poor person money and they will likely be poor again very soon. take away a rich man’s money, or his means to earn it, and he will likely be rich again by nightfall. being upper middle class in this country is trivial…. and don’t give me some education or race speil about it…. if your brain is logically sound, you can sit back, think about a need of society, fill it, and make money. if you were right, you are upper middle class minimum. if you were wrong, then i guess you weren’t as smart as you thought you were. if you are unable to present yourself in a fashion that people will want to do business with you, then you are only fucking yourself. sooooooooooo bottom line, lets say we took everyone in the country who made less than $7,500 last year and we kill them. in your economic model, how will things change in the immediate future, and how will the quality of life change for everyone who was not killed? also, the real basis of that story is not caring about the idiot that got killed…. he was a common crook, and will not be missed… the real problem is people are asking the question “what if that happened to ME somehow”. jenh is just sitting around reading cosmo or some such drivel and the feds come in and someone said they saw you kill someone. they swear under oath they saw you do it. you know you didn’t do it, they know you didn’t do it. no motive other than not having to deal with the hassle of the police. and now you are on death row. and to be honest, the world could use one less conservative, flip the switch stan! BZZZZZZZZZ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ BZZBZB ZBZBZB BBZB ZBZBBZ BZ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

    JEN H IS DIED!

  2. also, that 55 to 25 speed trap at the edge of town could probably tell a lot of juicy stories. in fact, i’d do a yearly speed trap issue.

  3. 1. I was thinking The Spped Trap would be a monthly feature. Who Got Caught This Month? The butcher? The baker? The candlestick mayor? Devoting a whole issue may be better, though. I’ll have interviews with the local Policemen, dashboard camera pics, and a story on the benefits to the local government thanks to the money brought in. New swingset at the park? New speedbumps in the Walgreen’s parking lot? Perchance, a new, improved radar gun?
    2. RE: the paper. wow… just, wow. “This man was not Oedipus, mainly because he was a fucking douche bag.”

  4. Also, I love it when Oedipus grabs his “12 sided double dildo and leaves town.” I can see 2-sided, or 12 inch, but a 12 sided dildo? Amazing, the amount of technology we lost when the Greek society sundered.

  5. that is precisely why this kid is genius. and he lets you know in places like that… another topic i think about because of poker, but know very little main stream ideas about is psychology. take an animal running on pure instinct. now add doubt of those instincts and BOOM, you have perceived intelligence. now humans generally operate exactly one step passed this…. thinking about thinking about their doubts. most things on the 3rd level will be inverses of the 2nd level which is itself mainly an inverse of 1st level doubt + instincts only. so people who fully operate on level 2 don’t operate on level 3 almost ever because of the risk of doing what someone on level 1 would do is terrifying. in poker however, the places for 3rd level thinking are somewhat clearly defined, so that sometimes throws you into 4th level thinking which runs of the risk of being exactly like 2nd level thinking. so while playing poker, recognizing someone else recognizing a place where 4th level thinking would be appropriate, and also NOT the same as 2nd level thinking proves to me that this person is VERY likely a VERY good player. a very good THINKER. now, back to the kid and his paper. he could write it in proper english and do exactly what the teacher wants, but that’s just silly… he isn’t giving anyone the opportunity to see his genius. so instead, he makes the worst paper ever (according to accepted standards) and whenever he is given the opportunity to really step up his game, he goes schick on their asses and pulls out the 4th level. 2 sided? 2nd level. 12 inch? 3rd level, but possibly 1st level. 12 sided? 4th level and pure gold. he thought about how to make this paper as bad as possible, yet not at all dismissable. 61%… D-… as close to failing as posible. ironically enough the golden ratio (61.8033…..%) something us crazies use to define each next level of thinking. this kid should be our next president.

  6. i’m deep in a multi right now and just saw a huge pot with 3 dudes all in… KK vs AQ vs KQ…. KQ made a straight…. GENIUS! DOOOOOOOO DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  7. I agree, he was extremely lucid at times. He also successfully digested an ancient greek myth into street slang (and even a goddamn rap!). This fucker knew exactly what he was doing. ps– I liked the pictures, and also the fact that he included a written threat to (presumably) the reader.

  8. BUBBLE BOY! I’M THE BUBBLE BOY! NICE RIVER YOU FUCK, I ONLY HAD YOU 1 OUTED, AND LUCKY YOU, YOU HIT THAT INSIDE STRAIGHT YOU FUCK.

  9. oh, the multi. 42 people left. 40 get paid. i am dominating my table with 14,000 chips in 9th place. seat open at our table and dude comes in with 13,500. blinds 200-400. fold fold fold, and new guy limps for 400. i’m the big blind and it folds to the small blind who completes. i have 56s. 1k in the pot, and i’d sure like to have 15k than 14k. 2nd level thinking, both of these people have shit, they didn’t raise. 3rd level… the big stack could be trying to trap with a big pair, but after a mid position limp, the small blind can be ruled out from having a hand. if i raise, i am 100% certain small blind will fold. so now all thats left is to determine if new guy has a big pair. after 3 folds, the limp re-raise play loses a lot of value… less people to raise for you. but with a big stack in the blind, he may want to slow play and hope i catch a piece of the flop and play a big pot with him. put, right on the bubble i decide he would never try either of these plays and i push all in. he has KK. bah. i hit a pair on the flop and a flush draw on the turn, but didn’t improve beyond that. all in next hand, and i’m a ghost ghost ghost. $30 for 40th place… maybe should have tried to get that. fucking donkeys.

  10. ok chum’s, look on the private tourneys tab under sit’n’go’s. edrugtradr’s tournament… $5. PL O8. the password is whazzmaster. slow blind structure and unlimited rebuys for the first hour. winner takes all. lets play.

  11. All the cops in Franksville hang out on the side of either Airline Road or HWY 38. That way if you don’t fully stop at the intersection of K and 38 they knab you at Airline road. Oh and to put in the magazine…There is a new Subway restruant going up in Franksville, I’m quite excited about it!

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