48 thoughts on “Week’s End

  1. It’s Mafia Day here on whazzmaster.com. Join in the fun, but you’d better be part of the UNION (aka U.P.Y.O.U.R.S.: The Union of People You Oughta Respect, SHANE).

  2. alright moneypenny i know you ain’t necessarily a “dog person” but if you hurt our phineas you and spacebee will be hanging from the nearest pole. and i’m 25% italian and watch a LOT of sopranos and goodfellas is my favorite movie so LOOK OUT!

  3. Ew. The “toy” on the floor belongs to the dog.

    Anyway, Zach, this is a nice website, it’d be a shame if anything happened to it.

  4. Nothing is going to happen to the website or the house or the dog’s dildo! the democrats are in power! sorry i’m a one trick pony.

    boom!
    cal

  5. i’m growin’, growin’, growin’!! on friday, i weighed in at 15lbs, 2oz (40th percentile), and i measured 26.25 inches long (90th percentile). i’m a long, lean baby!!

    also, can i just tell you all how much i HATE getting shots??? i mean, there’s this nurse, and she’s acting like she’s all nice and friendly, and she’s talking to you like she likes you, and then WHAM!!! all of a sudden she jabs you with this thing right into your thigh, and it hurts like hell, so you scream, but she just keeps on jabbing you practically in the same spot everytime, and all the while she has her stupid fake smile on her face, and she keeps acting like she’s all nice. that’s why i hate shots: they hurt real bad.

    also, my mommie says that if you guys keep talking about the doggie’s toy like that, i might not be allowed to look at the website anymore. she says it’s bad enough that i have a potty mouth… 😛

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  7. people be stealin, man. people be stealin. watch your shit phineas… your little dog dildo could be nothing but air tomorrow.

    build an autonomous robot to protect your things.

  8. and dr. 4nyayo is over there building them satellite dishes…. not that they would ever use those in some sort of autonomous play to kill humans or anything, because no one would ever do that.

  9. just bombed out of 20 ploiter sng in 5th. 4 way all in with 5 left… flop is 2s3s7. i have 77As4s. R U JOKIN ME?! turn is a T. wawaweeewa, heads ups up and i’ll have 85%+ of the chips! $100 here i come! river a 4, and they ALL have A5.

    full tilt is rigged or controlled by an outside force specificly designed to make me lose in the most illogical ways possible. earlier tonight, KJs pushes first hand in the cutoff in a multi… 1500 for the 45 in blinds. silly play. he wants to gamble. the button calls (turns out he has KJs TOO!). now i got JJ in the small blind… i couldn’t see how i could fold… just too be an opportunity to get rich quick to turn down. wow. if they don’t hit a straight or flush or catch that K they are dead. flop QQ4. BOOM. they are dead. river is a K…. so that is just shitty. then you put me all in COMPLETELY DOMINATING THE FIELD, and you river me again. that is like 6 or 7 3 out rivers all in for HUGE pots in tourneys that would payout huge in ONE DAY. look full tilt. i’m too smart for this shit. i am convinced the site is rigged. i got chat banned a day or 2 ago giving them motive to turn on this feature against me if they had such capabilities. the odds of this happening are more than 1 in a billion lifetimes of doing nothing but poker. some might say the odds of you reading this very sentance at this point in history are unfathomable and such oddities happen all the time. NO. no no no. this shit is rigged. they ALL have A5?! and i flop the nuts with the nut draw and the made nut low, and they ALL get counterfeited by the 1 card that chops all my chips 3 ways amoung the remaining players?! COME THE FUCK ON. that is just cruel. i ain’t playing that shit. you fucked me for the last time full tilt.

  10. somehow some players can see how all the cards will lay before they are dealt. if that was the case, ALL of the plays against me today make perfect sense.

    fucking rigged.

  11. it was a limped pot by the way and all the money went in on the flop. fucking JOKE. after the 2nd call i was creamin my jeans, then the last dude RE-RAISED for another 100 chips or something all in. NICE! PAY ME. you are joking. full tilt. you know what you did.

  12. all the car companies are going broke… so not only is our dependance on foreign oil destroying our economy, and a corrupt federal system burning our tax dollars on programs that work against each other, now they are going to bail these companies out just to make sure we can keep our dependance on foreign oil intact. no cars = no need for gas. no profitable car companies = no cars. government wants cars, government gives car makers money. isn’t that in direct violation of this whole “invisible hand of the system” of capitalism?

    i have a feeling that that hand is only invisible to people that it will never lift up.

    IT IS ALL A FRAUD. fuck the system, i got guns.

  13. armed forces propeganda is going in a very interesting direction lately. anyone else picking up on the subtle changes? if so, prove it. tell cal what you saw.

  14. good fucking prices too. that invisible market shit or whatever works awesome for guns. like 4 bills for a clean 9… a 9 for 4. that is over 50% off… FAR from invisible.

  15. tonight in my head i wrote my master thesis “economic relativity”. there is an awesome chapter in there about poker rake structure and dealer wages. i made a reference to dealer danny, too… i hope the prof gets a kick out of that.

    the variable changes between 6-12 and 3-6 being maximized in the economy is an application of this theory.

  16. shit. like 50 people have already wrote books by that title. perhaps this is not a new idea. it’s applications to poker theory however might be. perhaps their books don’t even understand the shit i’m talking about though and they just named their shit economic relativity to copy my ass. either way, it’s a good read. in my head.

  17. consider this… you are playing in a 3-6 hold’em game. $3-4 rake per hand. now all you know about the players in the game is that they are here now and paying that $3-4 rake per hand + dealer tips. that is certain. got fancy clothes, could have just mugged someone. talk with a british accent, they are assholes. have a beard, so does cal. all you know FOR SURE is that they are there paying to play right along with you.

    now you bet the river into a lets say $24 pot. $6 more. now, in the game for the opponent, this is a pot odds question… he gets 5:1 on his call. that is all that matters. they are only chips. TRUE. they ARE only chips, but guess what we did sneaky, we equated an arbitrary external currency amount with the unit value of the chips in the game. money IS being gambled. they are just chips, but those chips are money at the same time. so psychologically we can’t ignore this factor, or at the very least it’s potential presence in lesser minded opponents. so lets relate it to the one thing we know. they are here. they are contributing to the table paying $3-4 in rake per hand + dealer tips. so that $6 is pretty much the cost for this hand to exist… are you willing to call that much almost certain you are losing but with a slight slight chance they are good, but the pot is certainly not paying you odds to do so unless you put me on a complete bluff. but that’s the thing. i am on a complete bluff, and precisely gauging and exploiting your willingness to call is important. now you sat through this hand for the entire period this hand has existed. it took time. the building, the heat, the parking, the dealer, the table, the chairs, the carpet, the tv… you being there taking up space, it all has costs, and that cost is about $5. if you call, then this hand is over and you know this hand cost $5, so what $6 only other than paying your bill for playing the hand… lots of loose river calls. jump to 6-12, and relatively that $12 river bet now makes it like getting a bill 2.5 times what you know it’s worth. it’s a relative change, and as you go up in limits, there is no jump that this theory applies to more than 3-6 to 6-12 in terms of cost of play. meaning that applying this one theory to how it will effect how much more or less often you’ll get called due to it’s output, well the change between 3-6 and 6-12 is the biggest that change will ever be and it naturally decays as limits increase.

    just one of many applications of economic relativity.

  18. oh man, i just invented an awesome new poker bad ass thing to do… bet the river and simutaneously say/type “PAY YOUR BILL”.

    man, that is awesome. especially if i’m bluffing. i wonder if i’d get called more or less.

    hmmmmmmmmmmmmm. asshole relativity coming soon.

  19. whoa, whoa, WHOA– i think we just strayed into the territory of THEORETICAL ecomnomic relativity. beards?! CAL playing POKER? “bluffs”?

  20. “the relative asshole” has a better ring. also, it has multiple potential meanings… good for getting the word out. i probably could write a book about being an asshole on internet poker chat. i’ve been banned from every site on the web. you can’t see me.

  21. you throwing a furniture breaking (in?) party at the jiggah joint this weekend? you need a PA system cause my ass is finnin to drop some montell jordan like it aint nerrrr been dropped. YNV. SCC.

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