Let Me Get This Straight…

I live two blocks from the Kohl Center. I thought it might be nice to take in a basketball game between Wisconsin and UW-Green Bay last night. I go to the uwbadgers.com web site to try and buy a ticket, only to find that:

  1. The school doesn’t sell single game tickets. Period. Every ticket is a season ticket. They say they do this to preserve the school’s 71 game sellout record. Hoo-fucking-ray. I suppose I understand this. OK. Fine.
  2. As an aside, in case you wanted to buy season tickets you can’t just buy them. You have to donate a certain amount of money to the athletic program just to have the opportunity to buy them. And, from what one of spacebee’s co-worker’s husband told me $500 doesn’t get you the opportunity, so it’s somewhere north of that. Fine, they needs to get their monies somehows.
  3. BUT, there was a link on the page to the UW Ticket Marketplace, where season ticketholders can sell unused tickets to single games. “NICE,” I think, “I’ll just pick up a ticket on there.” only to find that
  4. YOU HAVE TO DONATE MONEY JUST TO BE AFFORDED THE OPPORTUNITY TO BID ON A SINGLE GAME TICKET. You can’t even enter the Ticket Marketplace unless you have donated at least $50 to the athletic department.

Motherfucker, I just wanted to watch a single fucking basketball game against You-Double-You Fucking Green Bay and I have to be motherfucking Andrew Carnegie just to do it?! Fuck that, I’ll watch the game at the Main Street Depot.

I know wwhazz hates donations to the university; I got a tongue-lashing just for donating $250 to the Computer Science Department, but I thought it was OK to support the department I got my degree from. Hell no I’m not giving the university athletic department $500 just to be able to buy a ticket to watch the Badgers slaughter fucking Buffalo. All that to buy John Stocco a Cadillac Escalade? No.

50 thoughts on “Let Me Get This Straight…

  1. We’ve got sceizzer, rach-o, my sister, and her friend coming down/up (respectively) here this weekend for the Wisconsin/Buffalo game. A time will be had, and that time will be labeled: F-U-N.

  2. If you really want a ticket, just buy it off some fat dude on the corner… buy your weed off him too.

    I saw the “there’s” in the fake lawman’s post, but I just let it go with a smile as it was the first typo I ever saw him make. Ever. But now he’s still the champ and that makes me smile too.

    Madd, send the pic to mjwirkus {little ‘a’ thingy} gmail {what goes between ‘something’ and ‘com’? dot} com or just post it here. I don’t think I can get into my edu.

  3. is it cool if quincy comes too? he also asked if he could play with phineas, and i had to explain to him that that is phineas’ decision. then he threw a knife at me… that let me know he was serious. so i promised him that he could.

    i hope he doesn’t hurt me when i don’t produce.

  4. whazzmaster, why don’t you edit wwhazz’s post and take out the email now so it don’t get herrversted.

  5. Just wanted to remind everyone that “Jesse’s Song” IS the greatest episode of any show ever. EVER!!! I must now thank Zach for purchasing the SBTB DVDs for me so that I may watch this piece of television history whenever I desire.

  6. rumthumbs, what do you hear about lampoons van wilder: the rise of taj coming to theatres dec 1st. this is the first i’ve heard of it, and i liked the original. are they pissing on it, or making a quality movie?

  7. zmoney- just go to Witte Hall and look at the bulletin boards, i betcha some poor student would love to take your money for a b-ball ticket. GMX I love SBTB as well. one of my favorite things about working night shift is that from 0300 to 0500 they play only reruns of SBTB. So when I bath my stinky patients in the middle of the night I have something to watch, i love it and I think they enjoy it too even though they are intubated and sedated.

  8. 1. maddddddddddd: wwhazz has to learn by himself not to post such things on the interweb.
    2. gmx: you’re welcome, and good to see you back on whazzmaster
    3. maddddddddd again: hmm, i know my building doesn’t allow dogs, but we may be able to hide him here for two days. what does whazzmaster.com say? do you think we could get away with it? does your coming hinge on him coming too or is there someone to watch him there? i need details.
    4. bellygirlx: good idea; i can also pick up some beer for them.
    5. anyone in particular: that air hockey robot was fucking great.
    6. ktk: I was reading the journal sentinel today and it had a big story about the beginning of deer hunting season. for one second I thought “it would kinda cool to go hunting” then i thought, “no, no it wouldn’t.” I actually did.
    7. To All: Since I now work out of the house, I’m thinking of doing yoga in my spare time. I realized at the gym today that my flexibility is for shit. I’m also sure spacebee wouldn’t mind if I could do all sorts of twisties.

  9. dear Q, i am happy to play with you. i just got my 4 month shots so it’s officially safe for me to have friends now, the vet says. you should know that i’m still humping everying, which is funny because 3 different vets haven’t been able to find my balls. my parents think that i am compensating for my missing/hidden balls by proving to everyone that i’m still sexual.

    at any rate, come on over.

  10. MP, last time i talked to springer he was living just outside madison. doing a lot of freelance stuff so i don’t know if he’s still at the shop. we actually shot a wedding together once which was funny.

  11. Hmm, I was going to walk up to the Camera Co during lunch today was wondering if maybe I’d be able to catch a glimpse of the original Old Man. Maybe, maybe not *dreamy sigh*.

  12. Hey if something evil is going to happen to me stop it, you jerk. USE YOU POWER FOR GOOD. And I might reward you with springer info.

  13. I changed it. Lesson: don’t post your email address on web sites. Bots can harvest it and send you boner pill ads. Unless you really want boner pill ads; then post away.

  14. Dude, I live seconds from TJ: I got already got the boner pill hook up.

    Call me if you want Springer’s digits… I can’t post them for fear of bots. FUCKING BOTS!!!!!!!!!!!

  15. Whazzmaster Live! in Madison. Not to be confused with Whazzmaster on Ice!

    So I found myself with 1.85$ in my stars account and I entered a 1.25 + .50 18 man SNG. I took that bitch down for 10.80 (plus I had a side bet with timmer that I would get further than him… he got 2nd but in a different one than I played.)

    So I took my 10.80 and played a 3 ploiter… I took 6th.

    So I took my 7 and played a 180 man $4 multi and did the laundry. I got 30th for zero.

    So I had 1.35 left, so I played a $1.20 45 man multi. I took 8th; top 7 paid.

    Now I really am broke as a joke. But I had some fun and just getting deep felt sorta good. Feel like my mojo is coming back. So is my sexy. So is a big ole shipment of top o’ the line boner bills.

    VIVA LA BONER PILLS

  16. VIVAN LOS TIMBERWOLVES! i saw a bumper sticker that said that right when i got back in good ol’ minnesnowta. i think norm coleman just wanted to bring hockey back to sway the illegal mexican vote. that fucker.

  17. my roomate jay from la crosse OWNS those $1 45 man tournies. he plays them all night every night and doesn’t sleep anymore.

    if you had that dedication, perhaps you wouldn’t bubble. the trick you will learn is calling off significant portions of your stack at any opportunity you can find.

  18. don’t bet. don’t raise. CALL. it’s so obvious. your dreams are getting in the way. sleep is destroying you. all you need to know is CALL.

  19. madison was as advertised: F.U.N. everything you’ve heard about the old fashioned is true… they know what they are doing and execute very strong.

    phineas: do not trust picture you’ve seen. he is much smaller and cuter than he appears.

    ashley: still fearful of the interstate. god, i wish more people were. that shit is deadly as hell and most people refuse to acknowledge that. on my drive back i made personal guarantees that 5 seperate drivers would be “dead within 100 days”. i would have bet my own life on it. sorry i couldn’t make it out saturday… my dog can not be trusted to not be an asshole when frightened, and me and my lady friend were crap our pants exhausted. next time we do jager bombs till we puke.

    madison in general: wow, you like drinking more than i’ve ever remembered. the hojo bar had a line all the way to the lamp lighter, and i don’t even know what that is.

    whazzmaster the person: HOLLLLLLLLLLLARIT. thanks for your lovely calish hospitality, and sorry about returning the favor with abused cookware and a plugged toilet… WHOOOOOOOOOPS! hopefully that all magiCALly worked itself out. also, next time, jagerbombs till we puke.

    whazzmaster the site: sorry you weren’t full of as much madddddddness over the weekend. i only read you while playing silly internet games. that doesn’t mean i don’t love you. if you could drink, and not just be a website… i would drink jager with you until i puked.

    HOLLLLlllllllARIT

  20. where is whazzman’s post on the weekend? get up to speed for god’s sake–you are usually on the instant replay!

  21. yeah I agree the californians want to hear it all!!!! to make the wiscos jealous it was 84 degrees and sunny today, i got out of bed early just to sit in it and cook. looking forward to coming to the cold to visit. but yes whazzmaster bring on the weekend scoop.

  22. i was at rumthumbs house on a friday night, and just like i pictured, there was an extra girl there; but on the tv? no porn. projected on 3 walls via non-existant LCD projectors? no porn. dildos on the floor? nope, it really was a stuffed giraffe. it is quite possible that porn friday does not exist; that it was all a farse. that was sort of disappointing, but it was nice seeing you guys! thanks again for helping out… i was 20 minutes from madison when i dog gone news. that shit was CLUTCH. quincy shitting IN trilobyte studios… ALSO clutch. nice work, asshole. a baby came over to play saturday night, and quince was terrified. he doesn’t know how to be the bigger man, he gets totally confused. did he ever start playing back with The Phin? did quince get humped? did porn friday start after we left? i bet it did. i’d bet my life.

  23. hilariously enough, finny remained the dominant pooch though he’s 4x smaller than quincy. but they did learn how to play. good thing it wasn’t snowing or we would have lost them both.

  24. summary coming when i have some time. long story short: fun. madddddddddd did a great job recapping saturday, sunday proved equally interesting.

  25. hey law geniuses: what are the legal ramifications of yelling at the top of your lungs, “pound the floor one more time and i will come up there and shoot you in your fucking head”. just curious.

  26. “shoot” is such a broad meaning verb… i could shoot them with toothpaste. and what head? the head of their 3 wood? obviously there was a misunderstanding here.

  27. GMX, you got a passport? i thought the law was changing in 2007 that you need one to pretty much leave the county.

    i don’t have one… so if there was even a chance of going, i’d probably have to get one soon. might even already be too late.

  28. an oft forgot piece of trivia… the cash money millionaires live by one simple motto, and that motto is “drink till you throw up”.

  29. i totally meant i would squeeze some toothpaste on your golf clubs. stop jumping to conclusions mat.

  30. off to see the new bond movie, and hopefully not get pissed off about the feasibility of any of the tech devices they present to me in their fantasy world.

    in poker news, the dude who busted me in the FTOPS event 1 when we were both big stacks and gambled a flip that he obviously won… well, he got 1st in that event, then parlayed that to a final table in the FTOPS main event for another big big 5 figguh+ cash. coin flips can change lives. read about it here if you care. i find it interesting, but i’m bias…

  31. Hey now that I have a hook up at the new movie theater in town we can go for free. Let me know this weekend. YAY!

  32. You are doing a wonderful thing here on the Internet. I wish you the very best. Kindest regards.

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