We went to see Knocked Up last night. It is rare that I exit a theater without thinking I’ve wasted part of my life, but there were two reasons that didn’t happen: 1.) I was bored as all hell this weekend and 2.) the movie was just plain great. I won’t totally spoil it for you (psst: this chick gets knocked up) but the part where people go to Vegas and do shrooms while watching Cirque du Soleil is pretty dope. Ah fuck it, the whole movie is really dope. Just go watch the damn thing.
On second though, don’t do it tonight (Monday), tomorrow (Tuesday), or Wednesday though. That’s when the Fucking Cubs are coming north to play the Brewers at Miller Park. Gather all of your lucky pennies around you in a heap, and then eat a Four-leaf clover salad with rabbit foot dressing or whatever. Not necessarily because I think the Cubs will win the series, but because I want to sweep those filthy pieces of shit back to that stink-hole they call home. And note that I’m not talking about the NotDouchebag fans (like my sweety-pie and her clan) but the onslaught of “WOOO”-ing backwards cubs hat fuckwads that make Miller Park such a shitty place that the Brewers get booed in their own fucking stadium. I can’t handle that. I wish I had enough money to buy all the unsold tickets and give them to small children from Oak Creek to Marinette. Hey Hadley, you wanna go to a baseball game? Grace-o?
So for those that haven’t seen the last few days on Sportscenter, Pinella is suspended indefinitely and Zambrano apologized for punching out his catcher in the locker room. Ha ha you assholes. I guess $300 million doesn’t buy quite as much team cohesion as you’d like. Please, god, just let the Brewers mince the Cubs up into tiny pieces and send them back to the dump of a park they call Wrigley.
Next weekend (from what I gather) we’re all heading up to Points North to kick it with the Kalishes in Rural Splendor™. I hear they have a porno basement. I think I’m bringing the smoker with too, perchance we could make some rib-sticking ribs. At any rate, hurray for Ruralacity.