Word of the Week: Doppel-gang-bang
We had three whazzers present at my brother’s weekend-long celebration of bachelorhood and its impending end. Timmer, wwhazz, and I spent all day Saturday making ourselves unhealthy to the point of some kind of whack contamination, but we still had a good time. A not-in-order list of some fond memories follows:
- Saturday night, wwhazz and I drove through hellacious rain and thunder to get down to Racine in order to escort my brother to Potowatomi for an evening of gambling. That place currently lies in a ruins not unlike a quarter of the Las Vegas strip at any given moment. It’s all for their ‘expansion’ project, which, if applied to something like countries would be like Japan annexing China. I predict that eventually Potowatomi will own everything in the Menomonee Valley from Lake Michigan to Miller Park. Oh yeah, I lost $100 in 3-6 limit. Shrug, no cards.
- Finding yourself at a strip club two nights in a row is either an incredibly satisfactory experience or an embarrassing one. I triumphantly choose the former.
- Petrifying Springs Golf Course in Kenosha was like playing golf in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. Yeah, genius, it was wet.
- The Aaron Moneypenny Main Event of Poker tournament went well enough. Forty dollar buy-in, 2000 chips to start, and 9 players. To give you an idea, we only got up to about 200-400 before it was all over. The wiener? Timmer, with second place going to Uncle Frank.
- For roughly a dozen people, my brother ordered roughly a dozen goddamned pizzas. Later at the bar when Joey ordered a bar pizza my brother exploded, “WE HAVE EIGHT LEFT AT HOME, WHY DON’T YOU JUST ORDER ELEVEN MORE?!”
- Our ‘designated driver’ drank more at the bar than I did. A unique interpretation of the term, I guess.
- My brother had prepared a nice spread of food for the poker games. Unfortunately, the food table was located in the garage such that the sun beat down on it for three straight hours, turning the cheese and sausage to grotesque vagueries of their former selves. Later in the day, the common rhetorical question “anyone want any sausage?” was typically met with catcalls.
- R., a player in the poker game, assured me that in heads-up play the button was always the big blind. I told him that was not so, and the basis he used for his argument was that “[he had] played tons of tournaments.” Then again, R. had some extremely interesting insights into “The River” that I will let wwhazz or timmer explain, if they please.
- Interestingly, my brother and I had a bunch of money on the golf game, and we ended to tying on the front, tying on the back, tying our overall score, and tying in skins. A hard-fought day of golf, reduced to no profit for either one of us. Pffft.
We didn’t get to see the UFC PPV, but wwhazz may come over and we’ll order the replay on Tuesday. I may also post some pictures once I get them up on flickr. I totally forgot to take any during the poker, but I’ve got some good ones from the golf outing.