I’ve been playing Fallout: New Vegas a little lately. A very little. I grabbed a strategy guide when I picked up the game and there is a problem when, after 10 hours, I am not past page 3 of the main storyline. The reasons I hate the game are encompassed neatly in a Short Story from my play yesterday.
I am on a main quest to find out who shot me in the head and left me in a shallow grave in nowheresville. I stop at a giant fiberglass dinosaur to ask the sniper living in its mouth if he saw a guy in a 70s checkered sportcoat come through. He says he has! I probe for more info, but he says that before he tells me anything he wants me to do him a favor.
Apparently an old research station to the west is spouting out ghouls that wander in to town. Dinosaur Sniper asks me to go clean up the facility and in exchange he’ll tell me about my friend in checkers.
Sighing, I make my way to the research facility where I am immediately beset by a pack of fast (FAST!) slavering, undead ghouls. After murdering the monsters, I fight my way into the building where I am surprised to be addressed by an intercom on the wall. I am instructed to make my way to the rear of the building to talk with a mysterious man. On the way I keep getting ambushed by moaning zed-heads.
When I arrive at a locked-down section of the building, I am disheartened to meet the voice from the intercom. It is a talking ghoul named Jason. He glows in the dark. He is very friendly. He apologizes for the members of his flock that have wandered into town, but they had gone crazy. Him and his crack staff are holed up there because THERE ARE DEMONS IN HIS BASEMENT!
He asks if I would be so kind as to go down into the basement and clean out the demons.
Sighing again, louder this time, I go to the basement and turn on my night-vision. I skulk around the basement for awhile and don’t see anything, until I burst right through a door on a demon having lunch. His name is Davidson. He is friendly. He starts talking to me about how the ghouls are evil and I’m being used in their plot. He asks if I would help him…
I blew his fucking brains out on the basement floor, as well as two of his henchmen that tried to stop me in my grim task. FUCK THIS GAME I WANT QUESTS TO RESOLVE NOT START AN INFINITE RECURSION!
Main quest > Side quest from main quest > Side quest from side quest from main quest > Side quest from side quest from side quest of main quest = Completely Stupid
Just play Borderlands instead. It is awesome.